Help me convince him to try working on our relationship
I have a boyfriend Aaron. He is 44 and I am a female, aged 36. We are having a lot of problems and he hasn't listened to me and how I feel for years, I have even tried to write letters, but he won't read them or reads them and does nothing. I am seriously considering leaving him due to his neglect. It's hard for me to because we have a child (4 years old son) and I still love him but I barely see him and when I do he is in a bad mood and isn't loving. He doesn't care about my feelings, I deserve to be made a priority, he needs to actually make an effort and try for us to have a successful relationship. We are supposed to be working toward getting married some day, and living together, but we have been together for 5 years and he isn't in any rush to do either one. Being with him makes me feel alone and sad, he ignores me for days on end and says he's too busy to even think about me. He never does anything loving like writing me a note or recording me a sweet message like he did once 5 years ago. I haven't had a note in 3 or 4 years. I have to ask him to buy me flowers and he never does. I am always sad and crying. I know it sounds dumb for me to even be with this man, my friends don't understand why I do either. I am honestly thinking of giving up. I told him he has 2 weeks to fix it on his end before I give up. Please help me convince him to try. He ignores my calls, texts, emails, he only contacts me sporadically and sees me for a couple hours each week even though we live only 30 miles apart. Help me convince him to try, please.
Sweetheart , you really don't need any response to this , I am so sorry I really am but you know the answer , you know the only logical choice if not for you for your child ,
He's already made up his mind , he's living his life and controlling yours , take control of the situation grit your
Teeth dig down deep and take your life back . I know what
You are going through and it's no way to live . You will never be happy with this man , he's either working on moving on or already has . Does he spend any time with your child ? Help support your child ? 30 min a week is enough to to see a child or a gf .
If I love a girl I'll never be too busy for her , and I'll always make time for her and she would never have to question
Wether I love her or not , if he's not giving you money for support or giving a small amount on my opinion he is keeping you thinking you are his girlfriend so he don't have to pay child support or a larger amount .
You are worth more than 30 min , get rid of him on your terms . It's coming you know that , don't let him go out with control over you . I'm sorry this sounds mean but you answered any question that could ever be asked .
Don't even give him two weeks , do it now , text him , he don't care enough for you to communicate with you , he don't deserve to hear or see you hurting . I wish I had nicer things to say but I can't lie , I truly am sorry and I hope you find happiness , and I hope I'm 100% wrong and he calls you before you are done reading this , but I'm not wrong about mostly what I have said for sure , but most likely I didn't miss anything . Good luck ma'am , get strong
I forgot to mention, every time I bring up a need for change on his end so we can be happy, he says I need to not mention it and not pressure him about it because it makes him dig in his heels and not do whatever it is. But he is the sort of guy who doesn't think of things unless it is in front of his face, out of sight, out of mind. We can go months and I don't say anything and nothing gets better or changes. We will do better ocassionally, like we were about a month ago, then he decides he wants to work on his car and makes that his priority. Instead of taking in to a mechanics, he decides to work on it himself and has already taken 3 weeks on something a mechanic would have done in 3 days. He works on it so slowly and just goofs around and hasn't spent any significant amount of time with me in 3 weeks. Even when I don't mention the problems I would like his help with, he does nothing to fix them. He says he will but nothing changes. That's just the most recent example. We can't work on it if he is never there and never talks to me. What do I do, how to convince him to give a damn about me or work on us? :,(
I have a girlfriend of 2 years , I would never screw her over like that , but let's say I did , she text me and said I have 2 weeks to fix things , I would be talking to her within 10 seconds to let her know I'm heading that way to fix anything I have done .
And I would go through hell to do so because I love her .
He hasn't replied to that yet why do you still want him ? He don't give a shit about what you think or if you get hurt . You are thinking about himself , you are thinking about him , who's thinking about you ? Not him , that is not love , he don't deserve another second Little on a chance to fix this .
You need to realize your worth , and you need to realize he don't even have the worth of discount toilet paper , the only chance you have is the tell him to fuck off and work toward moving on . If he wanted to work anything out it would have happened long ago . You can find out real quick , tell him you are done and leave it at that don't say another word , go somewhere and leave your phone at home if you have to .
If you mean anything to him he will be beating on your door , but most likely you will get bullshit excuses or nothing at all . He has no morals , he don't care .
He's 44 he's not changing ,the person you fell in love with was who he wanted you to believe he was , the guy you are seeing now is who he truly is and always was . You can't keep going on like this .
I know you're right, I definitely would have never imagined when we got together 7 years ago originally that I would be in this position...he seemed to care a lot more then. Now he doesn't ever have time to do anything sweet, he claims to be too busy but it only takes 5 mins to pick up the phone or write a note.
You didn't know , most everyone has been there and it wasn't your fault , but you do know now and you are at
A crossroad and where your life goes from here is up to you and only you , not him , he obviously isnt traveling remotely in the same direction as you .
He still hasn't got back to you ? Why are you wasting your life on him , every second gone could have been used for something that actually makes you happy . Get pissed off text him and don't text him back . And if he don't show up within an hour begging for forgiveness wipe your feet travel forward and don't look back