I need new friends *rant*
I think I need new friends or It's time for me to move.....
I'm a girl and right now I hang around mostly. I generally have no problem with that but these guys are jerks. Well one in particular.... Just to put out there he's an ex. We've worked ourselves to being friends because we live in the same area.
The thing is since I'm terribly introverted snowballed with the fact that I've been in a situation with "close friends" that threaten my safety. My friends are almost nonexistent. So to keep myself from going insane from depression I spend time hanging with my exes and our mutual friends. He is a nice person but he can run his mouth alot. He makes harsh jokes towards me, he pokes fun at my financial situation, and he's just acts disrespectful for no reason.
I'm almost to my wits end with him and the mutual friends we have in common. I'm to the point of where I could just suffer alone until I get my financial situation in order and just move far away from where I am right now. The worrying about it is getting annoying at this point.
Sorry if this rant is vague I just wanted to get this off my chest.
I know breaking away is hard and some people feel like being alone is the most devastating feeling. trust me....it is needed here. you have to get out of this situation asap. please. i got on here tonight to complain about how i am on the verge of losing everything and i saw your post and wanted to reply. sticking around is making you look dumb to this guy anyway and desperate. be independent and know in your heart that YOU are enough.
I don't know exactly what your situation is like and I won't pretend that I do, but I just had to respond because I feel like just kicking these people out of your life entirely sounds sad.
Your ex sounds kind of rude, maybe self-centered and oblivious to how you're feeling. Does he know that the things he is doing bother you, or that they bother you to this extent?
You also say that there are mutual friends involved here. The big thing here is, it's unclear whether these mutual friends bother you, or you just mentally lump them in with your ex because they are also friends with him. Who knows, maybe some of them can see your point of view and would go out of their way to be more thoughtful friends (than your ex) for you?
One thing I notice here is that you have a bunch of guy friends, and these guy friends all like to hang out together. Guys can be immature and idiotic in groups. It doesn't mean they're necessarily bad, they just aren't as sensitive and thoughtful as women, generally. Perhaps you could stand to have more female friends to talk to?
I'm not sure what you mean about "close friends" that threaten your safety. Are there some sketchy people that who have caused trouble for you in the past? And if so, are your ex or your mutual friends with your ex somewhat sketchy people?
Your financial situation... I don't want to press about that, but lots of us have issues with money - I'm sure someone you know can relate. Most people won't make fun of you because you owe a lot of money, or because you don't make a lot of it. Most people would just appreciate if you have a job and take it seriously.
You also seem determined to move far away, but I wonder why. The thing is, no matter where you go there will be negatives and positives. Live up North and deal with cold Winters, live down South and deal with natural disasters, etc. It's unrealistic to think that moving elsewhere will just magically solve problems you are dealing with.
I'd say a big problem you have here, from what I can tell, is that you never make your feelings known. You don't stand up for yourself. And I'm sorry you are lonely and get depressed, and that maybe the best place you have to go to for friendship is your ex and the friends you both share. But I feel like you maybe aren't giving these people enough credit as individuals, and you aren't doing all that you could probably do to find this friendship you long for, or to make yourself happier with your life in general.
Chin up. Do the best you can do, and don't worry so much about how others view you. In all honesty, your ex probably doesn't mean anything by his insults, he probably just doesn't know how else to joke around and lighten the mood as a gentleman.
Yea. We talked it out. He knows that his mouth goes too far.So he apologized. I just give myself time before I pull people to the side and tell them that they are being hurtful. As far as female friends go, most of the female friends I have gossip or like to speak for me. It may seem harmless to them but it has caused more harm for me than good lately. I just want to move away because I don't feel happy where I am anymore.
What most people don't realise is that they have a choice as to what character to be.
My advice is, change your introverted Character, Pursue what you genuinely want. You will thank yourself when looking back.