Need some encouragement right now please
Okay so let me start off by telling you a little of my background. My parents physically and emotionally abused me and my siblings. I was adopted by my maternal grandparents at age 12, and now I'm 17. Since I was adopted, I've lost contact with everyone else in my family except my adopted parents. I no longer have any contact with any cousins or aunts/uncles or my paternal grandparents.
When I was 13, I was diagnosed with moderate depression. I did some therapy and I was fine. Then when I was 15, I met this guy and fell in love with him. He ended up only using me for my body and broke my heart. I was devestated. I was then diagnosed with severe depression and had suicidal thoughts. I did an outpatient program about 7 months ago, where I was in therapy for 6 hours a day for five days a week. I slowly got better until recently.
In December of 2015, I met this guy in my school. We grew close and began dating. He seemed really different from most guys. He was so sweet to me and I fell hard for him. We broke up about two weeks ago because he said he didn't love me anymore. It crushed me to pieces because first of all I don't have many friends at all at school. He was like my best friend. And then he told me he didn't love me anymore and basically never wanted to talk to me again. It really confused me because just two days before we broke up, we went on a date and hung out afterwards, and he was holding me close and telling me how much he loved me and kept kissing me a lot.
But anyways, since then, I've been really down in the hills. I can't seem to be happy about anything. I can't focus at school anymore, I really could care less about anything. I wouldn't even mind if a semi truck ran me over. I just feel like this depression I've had for so many years if going to be stuck with me for life. I feel like I'm never going to find someone who can love me through it either because every guy I've ever loved has left me broken to pieces.
I just need some encouragement
some people will not be realistic when giving advice. firstly you had a tough childhood. ur young and never had a child hood that was normal due to what u experienced that nobody can say i knw how u feel. reality is u been hurt .and all you wanted was a person who is ur rock ur soulmate ur world. sumone who is genuine and makes u smile. so il say one thing wat u have been through is tough but right now you wont realise but later on in life u will look back and realise your going to have all your dreams come true. i was young and was broken by hurt. depression is not d case becus d guy was your world now u feel its d end. stop. when u constantly think about dat one person it sends u mad nd yes u aint gt family or friends for dat hug or shoulder to cry on. so il say to u honestly if u ever heard mystory ud be shocked and realise dat theres ppl out there in worser situations.
1) dnt show ur weakness
2) keep ya self busy n u wont even think about it
3) depression? no! ur a person who is strong and will av d best happy life
4) i know over hundreds of ppl but reality out ov all of dem 1 is the true friend.
5) dnt show ur down or ur weakness. u gt all ur life ahead and dnt let anybody ruin dat.
6) if any guy is true he will b by ur side thru goid n bad. if this guy broke ur heart den gods showing u his not worth it.rather now dan 5 yeRs on
keep ya head high u aint weak your a person who will be happy and get far in life.
depression is like a siphon : you put one toe in it and you get sucked all the away down and once you're down there you need help to get out - so don't go there - not even near
to do so - you have to force yourself to focus on all the positive things you want to realize, to accomplish, to be : you have to envision what good you want for yourself and stick to it - you can help yourself with anything positive and healthy that will nurture you and keep you on track : music, physical exercise, sites & forums, books and a good surrounding : leave or stay far away from any people and surroundings you know take you down and don't build you up - if you need to interact with people who are not helpful - be emotionally and mentally detached - deal only with the facts and move on
as for dating and boyfriends - same goes : refuse to go with anybody who doesn't like you for who and what you positively are - who's looking to take you down or abuse you - to do so you have to know your worth : once you have decided what you are worth you will not commit to anything or anybody who doesn't resonate on that scale - period
don't go looking for someone to "save you" : save yourself - because if you do go looking for someone to "make it all come true for you" - you are setting yourself up for codependency and the abuse that comes with it - and these people will "smell you from a distance" - so you too - develop your intuition and know, feel who and what is right for you : if even for one second it doesn't feel right - then it doesn't : don't second guess yourself - then speak up or get out
but all this will only become real if you want it to be real for you : so get your focus on and keep on track - one step after the other - and you will grow in inner strength