PeoplesProblems Logo

Friendship advice

Default profile image
Hi all. I'm 29 years old and suffer from anxiety and have a history of depression. I moved to a new town about 18 months ago and am still finding my way. I don't really trust other females as I've been bitten a few times, however I feel very lonely. I recently made a new female friend and she is great. We have a lot in common. The thing is, I feel strange about the friendship. It's hard to explain but it feels like we're dating and I'm desperate to keep her as a friend. I know she likes me a lot and we can talk about anything but I just feel like I want to impress her somehow, not by exaggerating or lying but by having an alcoholic drink so I'm less anxious and am brave enough to to meet up with her. I realise as I write this that it does sound fairly ridiculous but suffering from anxiety I always feel like an idiot when talking to new people and am constantly wondering if they think I'm an idiot. I don't want to feel like this, I want the friendship to progress normally and not feel any pressure. Any advice?

Friendship advice

Default profile image
"by having an alcoholic drink so I'm less anxious and am brave enough . . ." Is this something you feel you have to do, oftentimes? Even when it doesn't involve this girl? That's a mis-use of alcohol. And if you suffer from depression, you need to know that alcohol is a depressant. PS It seems she likes you just the way you are. Why mess that up?

Friendship advice

Default profile image
Hiya Thanks for replying. No I don't use alcohol as a crutch in that way often but don't a lot of people use a bit of alcohol every now and then for dutch courage for some reason or another? Not all the time just when they're feeling a bit nervous. She does like me but I'm not used to friendships sticking so I'm of course wary

Friendship advice

Default profile image
Your name says it all - you have made a monster out of all that figeting. worry, anxiety, low self esteem, over-thinking) Try to relax. She seems to like you and that's a great place to start. How do you de-stress, normally?

This thread has expired - why not start your own?

B-2