It's not dating, it's important friend met online
Sorry if it's not the right category but I think it's close since I like him so much.
Sorry it's going to be long.
I have some online friends from different countries to talk with. I know this one guy for nearly a year now (but this is not the one I have problem with) and we've been good friends. A little bit before New Year, he introduced me to his roommate. We started to talk from that day since.
He is different. It doesn't seem like usual flirts for me. He left offline messages saying something like 'I miss you'. We even talked in the morning when I woke up and getting ready for the day while he's going to bed. When my old computer broke down, he called me on the phone. So I'm impressed so much. I know this is so stupid but I can't help. He planned to visit and I can't wait.
He even said that I was one of the people he cared and he liked me. I shouldn't have bought that lies. He said that 'you know I have many chances to meet girls, but I don't. That should tell you something'. And I'm moved, and I want to believe so much.
But about 2 weeks ago, he just stopped doing what he used to do, leaving messages. That's why I don't know what he's been doing. One day, he came back to talk and when we parted he said 'talk to you tomorrow' but he didn't show up. His friend told me that he's taking care of his mom. I misunderstood it. I thought it was for that day only. So I waited every day until I couldn't take it and I call in the middle of his night which was so wrong I know. But he usually plays games til morning on Saturday so I just assumed. He called me when it was 5 am at his place before.
He got pissed. He told me before he's not easily get angry. So I fear so much and there I have it. He blocked my msn and skype without telling me. I begged his friend to tell him to talk to me, to clear things up. But he didn't want to try to understand me at all. I admit I'm so wrong but I'm so sorry.
He said his friends complained that he always talked to me. And said that he had life outside his room too. I've never forced him to spend time with me because I know I never can. He wanted to see me, I let him see me, in a very bad stages (no make up, just cried etc.). I wanted to see him, sometimes he kept canceling the calls. I can't help but wonder if his friends made him feel this is embarrassing.
Now I look at his name on msn and skype every day, but I don't even dare to say hi. I fear that he will block me again, forever. Last night he put on 'I'm dating'. It just hurts. I know we can never be a couple online but we were good friends. If we still are the same way, I could congratulates him easier. Now I'm mad at myself. I shouldn't have called. I'm so stupid to believe these are real too.
His roommate said he took it too far.
I don't have anyone to talk about this besides his roommate because he's the only one that know both of us. I can't help saying my feelings to him but I also feel guilty that I keep taking it out on him. I don't want him to be another one who hates me and leaves.
Whenever I know someone new I always say 'People always leave'. This guy who hurts me said 'Not him. Not intentionally.' I'm such a fool to want this to be something big, want all his jokes (marriage, child etc.) to be real.
I just want to be friend again. I don't know how can I wait anymore. It gets worse and worse everyday. I cry until my head is close to explode many times.
Please. I have no one to talk to.
Im sorry you are feeling this hurt and alone. I to have been in love with a man online. He is my life, my breath, my soul mate but he doesnt feel the same. I think you should move on. i know you feel lonely but it sounds like he moved on. Try to do stuff out in the real world as hard as it sounds to do that. You also cant be tied to the computer. You wont be able to meet friends or make new friends alone in your room.Online people move on,they loose interest and its hard on the other person .he said alot of the things my friend said to me but he has yet to meet me or show im as important to him as he is to me. So join the crowd,i dont mean to sound mean but I think yuou should move on . its easy to think this man was perfect, you dont see him on a daily basis. No other man will be like him but nothing worng with that. Give your self a chance,please dont be so dependent on people online most the time they dont have your best interest in mind. Not all people are bad but its easy to type anything that sounds good. You are a good kind loving person just move on knowing that you loved someone and it didnt work out