Prince Charming came too soon!
I want experience in the world. I'm just turned 18 and have been in a long term relationship with my boyfriend, the first boyfriend I ever had. He's had a couple of relationships before me and is now wanting to settle down and I don't know what to do.
I'd love to get a flat with him and settle down eventually because I do love him and love spending time with him but I'm afraid I'm too young and I haven't experienced anything else before I flood myself with responsibility.
Sex is also an issue- I've never liked it with him and I've told him, but I don't know whether it's us or just me because I've never tried it with anyone else. I want to experience more in life, not just in sex but in everything and I feel too committed to him to be able to do that.
I don't want to break up or take a break because I know how much it will hurt him and I genuinely love him- I don't want to ruin a good thing. But I'm seeing 30 year old women talk about their relationships and settling down in a similar way to us and I don't want to waste my life away not taking risks or being reckless once or twice.
Basically, I think I've found the soul mate everyone dreams about but he has come too early, can you please give me any advice possible?
If you are feeling this way, wanting freedom and wanting to explore, then if you don't you are going to regret and most likely hold resentment towards your boyfriend.
How long have you guys been together? How old is he? You are right you are very young. And while I understand you do not want to hurt him it does not sound like it would really hurt you to end it.
It does suck if he is a good guy, they are hard to find. Believe me. But if you want to explore and grow as a person, and you feel like you cannot do this with him, that you are not ready to settle down, then don't. I can't tell you everything will work out and that you will eventually find someone else. What I can tell you is that if you don't explore and live while your young, you will regret when you get older and have way more responsibilities. Will he wait for you? I don't know, and maybe he shouldn't, you guys are obviously not lining up as to where you want your lives at, that's a huge part of making a relationship work.
So I say, do not move in with him and settle down. Go live and grow. And then as you develope who you are you will attract more like minded people. Or find them. I hope it all works out.
First of all - NO - he's not your soulmate. He's not the whole package, and you MUST have that in a relationship.
You are right - Get out on your own and experience many things that will help you figure out this world. Travel, go to school, meet people, explore and experience life.
There - you now have permission to fly solo . . .
I understand how you feel because this is a time to explore in your life. It's nice to have a guy who likes you but if you explore and find out what you want in life that would be good too.
Your life is just beginning-18 is way to young to settle down. In order to be independent, and self sufficient you MUST get your education.
Have you thought about a career plan? Set some goals for yourself where do you want be in 5/10 years? You do not want to be like some 30 year old woman who the choice to marry to young, have children young, may go through a divorce having to raise children as a single mom.
Choices you make now will effect your life going forward.. Make sure you get on birth control if you're not already.