What should I do
I met this girl a few weeks back and since I can not get her of my mind. She just looks like the perfect one and it's making me go nuts because I know that a relationship would be very hard since she lives far away, I have only spoken with her once and she speaks another language. Even though I like her im not sure if I will be able to make anything happen from this. I try and forget her but she just keeps coming back and everyday I notice signs that relate to something but I keep thinking that its just my mind playing tricks on me.
For a bit of story we met online and spoke and I myself instantly felt a wierd feeling and she said that the distance would be a problem. I barely got to know her and also the language barrier didn't allow for lots of details.
This could all be because im only 17 and have not had a taste of the emotions I could encounter but this girl has me really interested. I want to know her but I don't know what to do as im not sure if we could even meet. She has recently started appearing in my dreams and everytime I think about her. Im so into her that I started learning her language, also because the language interests me.
Maybe someone can give me some tips of what to do or if to just try and get over it.
Hello there, first and foremost, I would like to tell you that I have had my fair share of online dating experience. And I have met up with over 10 different girls from various sites like tinder and pof. Online dating is remarkably unreliable for guys to begin with, but adding a language barrier and long distance makes it about 10x more unlikely to develop into a real life relationship. As an average looking guy with low to moderate self esteem, I used to really try to meet women online because it was the only way I had the confidence to talk with women and clearly say what I wanted to say. I am now 23, and about to give up online dating after years of using it. 1. After talking via text mainly, you can never anticipate how your chemistry will be once you actually meet.
In regards to your situation, and my experiences, I would suggest trying to meet women in real life, or just talking to them more often, especially if you find them attractive. Sure the girl you're talking to may seem better and more responsive than girls near you, but the fact is she is far away, doesn't speak the same language, has countless guys getting at her (assuming she is attractive). On the off chance you learn her language enough to effectively communicate in person, and you travel to meet, it's very hard to predict how things will go once you're together in person. Also, to have a relationship you would definitely want to be within 2 hours driving distance. It is very easy as a guy to become very attached to "the idea" of dating a girl that seems perfect for your tastes. If she is beautiful, then you will find yourself losing your mind thinking about what it would be like to have her as a girlfriend, or eventually sexual partner.
Conclusion: I would suggest keeping busy and trying to keep your mind off her. I know it's easier said than done! But over time, you will realize that there are so many women out there that could be just as good of a fit, if you had the confidence to approach them in real life. Don't find yourself at age 23 wishing you hadn't wasted years trying to meet a girlfriend from an online site, when after meeting, it usually ends there.
You are right, it's all just a fantasy. Im gonna give it a try and if I see its too difficult I will let it be. As you said there are many others and one day I will find the one that could really make it work. Maybe I found this one to be the perfect one because I don't know that much about her. In my few relationships I had I didn't have such a feeling so thats why I might have created such a fantasy about her.
Although im kind of shy I have the confidence that I will be able to find the one.
Thanks a lot for your help. It really means a lot to me.