In serious like with someone who seems indifferent towards me
I'm a not-so-good-looking guy who likes sports and cute girls. She's into all that K-pop and Korean drama stuff and she's the cutest girl I've ever seen. We met through another friend on an online video game and we started to talk. Important to note that she's not long distance; we live in the same city and she goes to the same school. She's nice and funny and smart. Of course I would be saying these things. She's complimented me on having a nice voice. I compliment her and she'll say things about not really liking being on the receiving end of compliments. It's all in good fun, but I can't help but wonder if she would be more willing to accept compliments and things from someone who was better looking. I know, I sound like a dweeb.
But seriously, when our online friendship first began, she seemed...more interested in me. She was quicker with responses, more willing to invite me to sessions of that online game, and more likely to skype with me as we were playing. Now, she takes ages to respond to my messages, and doesn't talk to me using voice chat anymore because she's always talking with her own friends.
I can't say for sure that it's because when we met in person (I offered to help her with an essay), she finally saw how unattractive I am. I feel as though our interactions online afterwards hadn't changed much until it seems to gradually have gotten to the way things are right now.
I don't know...it just seemed like I kinda had a shot at first. Maybe I started to bore her after a while. These things aren't the end of the world, but it sucks to be feeling down in the dumps over someone who you've actually seen once in your entire life.
Anyway, the point of this block of meaningless text was more to vent than anything. Feel free to advise/console/roast the shit out of me, LOL.
It's hard to say exactly what the reason is that she might have cooled to you. It might not be you - it could be that she gets super-excited when she first meets new people, and kind of 'lives for' that variety and newness. It might not be the lack of newness with you, so much as it is that you've now known each other for a while, and things have grown predictable. Predictable is nice, but predictable is also boring. Girls aren't the most thoughtful creatures whenever they become bored.
I don't know how close you are to this girl, how long you've been talking for, or how long you got to hang out that one day you met in person.
One thing I can say is that people kind of flock to things like online games, obsess over them for a while, and then get burnt out on them and kind of gradually stop playing for even longer periods of time. They might keep playing for a bit after the initial fun-factor has died down, or the return to the game after being away from it for a while and growing to miss things about it. Perhaps the one thing you two had in common - this online game - is something that she has cooled to, and now the game and the people she met on it (you) aren't as important to her right now.
Let's be real - it could be that she isn't attracted to you. Doesn't necessarily mean that you are unattractive. She just might be looking for something really specific. We all do it. Girls take this shit to a whole other level. From what you said, you two had some pretty deep conversations before, but don't anymore. And that's a shame that it ended, I'm not sure why that is. I would see if you could rekindle that magic and maybe at least stay good friends with this girl. But it sounds like your main outlet for talking to her was this game, and its voice chat. Unless you can find another way to talk, she might have blocked your path already.
You know, you seem like a decent dude. This is a pretty on-point topic, gets to the guts of the problem, and has a welcomed touch of humor as well. I can't say I know why guys like us don't end up with the girls we like so much. The world works in weird ways, sometimes in not very fair ones. As my one friend put it the other week, he has never in his life seen the good guy end up with the girl - why that is even he had no clue. But at least you can take comfort in knowing there are lots of people out there, and there is likely some other girl who will want to give you the time of day.
I would roast you if I had something clever in mind, however, I do not. Um... "Hey, you're so butt-ass-ugly, even the dog he's trying to get a date with turns and runs the other way!" ...I'm terrible at this. Anyway, hope my advice and consolation was helpful!
Hey man, thanks a lot for the thoughtful response. It really did offer me some comfort over my current situation. You definitely raise some really good points. Maybe I should've asked her out around the time when we first started talking..."strike while the iron is hot" as the saying goes. I've just always been so hesitant about these things. We still talk over Facebook messenger, although I'm almost always the one initiating the conversation and as previously stated, she takes a long time to respond to things I say. The green circle indicating that she's online will light up a lot without a response from her. She probably waits until she feels like it to respond to my messages. Which stinks because I'll respond to anything she says within a few minutes. That felt very loser-ish to type, lol.
Thanks again, and best of luck to you with the ladies as well. I don't know whether I'm a "good guy" or not, but you seem to be one, and I hope things work out for you!