I tried alot
Its been a long road man. Long and weary. Guess theres some things I need to get off my chest and hopefully Iâll feel better. No better place than here to vent a bit. So where can I start, in my previous post I was talking about my ex contacting again, talking a lot and giving some mixed signals. It didnât lead to anything though, tried to get to see her, didnât happen, and about a week ago I called her because I know we wont be talking as much when school starts, so I wanted to know whats up with us.
I called , told her I think about her a lot, right there she said to stop thinking about her so much, and I guess I never wanted to say more, that alone kindve gave away her attitude and what she wouldâve wanted from all this contacting. I would say I was a fool for being there and eating breadcrumbs but I donât regret it, because I cant lie to myself. Truth is I will always love this girl, and I would always care about her very much. The memories I had with her will stay with me and Iâll remember her fondly always. Im glad that aleast now we are on better terms and if I ever see her it wont be awkward.
I donât regret anything. I tried with her, god alone knows how much I did. I tried after we broke up, a month after that, when she contacted me and dropped the mixed signals I asked her if we could ever start over, she said no and then she doesnât know, then kept sending breadcrumbs and again after almost a year we started talking again I tried again, I really did, I knew what I wanted, I got over her we started talking again and she brushed me off. I am angry but im happy that now im done. When I called her I wished her the best and havenât talked to her since, her birthdays coming up but thatâs not my concern she wont be hearing from me.
Funny thing is I know Iâll hear from her again, maybe not soon but in a month or 2 something will come up again. Shes just like that because forgetting what we had will be hard for her, I had time to heal, she just jumped into a new environment with new things and new people. So yeah maybe some breadcrumb again soon but I wont be around. After 4 years it should be put to rest, weâve been broken up over a year now. Theres nothing there again and I truly donât want it anymore, I did before thatâs why I tried so hard, why I tried everytime she came and started talking again. Im done trying now.
Whats there to do again, wait to see her, she keeps saying sheâll see me sometime but never made an effort. And its just excuses. She lives lik 20 mins away from me, her school is like 90 mins drive, so if I had to see her I wouldâve seen her already. All that talking for 3 months was leading to nothing, I thought it would the way we talked, her especially just the way she talked and acted. Idk man I just lost hope now, if she wanted to be with me she wouldâve done things to show me that, all the contacting is childs play and I donât have time for it anymore.
If someones reading this and feeling heartbroken, take this coming from a guy who burnt a lot, spent weeks on about 20 forums looking for help and answers. Just walk away. Human nature is to run away from harm but when we love people we tend to forget that. Donât allow yourself to be hurt so much. Im SURE theres so much people out there who can make u happy.
I was feeling heart broken for so long, #1 contributor for that feeling was I was just sitting and thinking, never made that effort to move on. You should do something, and I mean something with physical aspects. Donât read a book, donât watch a movie, life and healing is outside the doors, meet people, try new things new people and bounce back, the punctured ball stays flat but the deflated ball can have air again. So get moving. Thanks for reading I hope you feel better, and u will
As for me. Im gonna take a shower and try to get a six pack lol.. For my abs :D .. So what are you gonna do??????????
Let's say, hypothetically, that you are an avid music fan. And there is this one really rare music album that you are trying to track down. You're going all over the place - to pawn shops, to record stores, to electronics specialty retailers, to yard sales. One day, you are on this journey, looking for this rare album. You stop at some place of business, and there you see hints that this place may carry the album you have been trying to track down. Perhaps you are seeing other uncommon albums that the same artist put out, or the place carries a lot of albums in the same genre as whatever it is that you're looking for.
Hopeful, you ask the salesman if he has the record you are looking for. His response goes a little something like this: "Sorry, but I don't think we do have that particular album in stock... But, wait, you know what? Actually, what did you say the name of the record was again? ...You know I actually think I might have seen that around the other day - let me go check!"
The response isn't quite what you want to hear. But some of the things the salesman said make you feel hopeful and optimistic that he will return with a copy of that fabled album in hand. And yet basically he said from the beginning, "No, I don't think so..."; even you, too, knew that he likely did not. You still want to hold out hope because this guy went on to say things like, "Maybe.", and seemed pretty excited about things. But deep down, you know it's just because he really wants to sell you something, and his memory of this one record maybe isn't that great because he is dealing with tons of different ones.
What I see here is a similar situation.
Your ex and you broke up. She told you she doesn't really want to get back together. Yes, maybe she is uncertain. But for the most part, it is sounding like she made the decision that she wanted to make, and now she probably needs time away from you to move on with her life. And just as that salesman is guilty of occasionally giving you false hope, so too are people guilty of not being sure of their own feelings. Maybe your ex said "Maybe we'll get back together, I don't know.", because she didn't want to hurt your feelings much worse than they already have been. Or maybe, she really isn't entirely ruling out her feelings she had for you once, but realizes that it didn't work out and that is why she is not very enthusiastic about that possibility.
I know exactly what you are saying about women leaving you 'breadcrumbs', man - I have something kind of similar going on with this girl who I've had a crush on for a while, but never actually dated. It's like I'll feel like we have this connection, and things are clicking...But then, I will try to keep in contact with her and make plans with her, and she just doesn't respond to me and keeps giving me excuses. And then I'll be like okay, she doesn't want anything to do with me... And try to distance myself from her again. ...And then out of the blue, one random day, she will start talking to me again and seem so close and happy. It is frustrating.
I really don't think most women mean to leave these 'breadcrumbs'. I hope not, anyway. But I think we tend to read into things too much, and see things the way we want them to be. Because, let's face it: We really want to get that damn record.