I have been married to my husband for 6 yrs and we have a son together. I have been previously married and have two children from a that marriage. When I first met my husband everything was fine. He was working for his mother. His mum and dad separated when he was 6 and only saw his father on a few occasions after that. His mother was to say the least extremely controlling over him and his brother and he was 'tightly tied to his mums apron strings' when I met him. We got engaged and planned for a baby. When I eventually got pregnant he was too afraid to tell his mother he was moving in with me . They had an extremely turbulent relationship. They would often argue at work and he would storm out and return the next day. Their issues were never discussed and just ignored or swept under the carpet. This seemed to make things worse.
Things started to go bad for us just before we got married. He went to the doctors and was diagnosed with depression. The doctor prescribed anti depressants and he took them for about a month but then came off them saying he was fine. Twelve months ago he had had enough at work so managed to get a new job. For the first couple off days it was ok but then on the evening of the 3rd day in his new jobs b he went missing. He told me that he had driven to his childhood house, over 25 miles away and had sat outside it for 3 hours. He had called the Samaritans while he was there. The next day he didn't go to work but pretended to me that he had. The following day he again pretended to go to work but didn't and had left me a note for when I got home from work. He was going to commit suicide.
I went with him the following day to the doctors and again she prescribed antidepressants and a course of counselling. We are now 12 months on from there and he has completed his counselling (which worked wonders) and is still taking his medication. He has also recently started a new job and is doing really well. The problem now is how I'm feeling after the most stressful 18 months that I have ever had. I feel like I'm living with a lodger. He doesn't engage in anything to do with the family, he doesn't help around the house and the affection has all gone. We have not had a sexual relationship for 12 months now and we don't even hug. After everything that had happened I feel completely numb and don't know what to do.
Have you gone to counseling as a couple? Or maybe you could go on your own? You have been through a lot.
A website that helps me when I actually practice it is compassionpower.com. It has tons of free info and advice.
I know antidepressants can cause a lack of libido, but it sounds like there's a lot more going on.