The best friend that won't go away
When I was 4, I made this friend in kindergarten. I realized quickly that she was kinda rude and drifted away from her. I'd see her over the years in public but we never spoke. Fast forward 30 years and she found me on facebook. Sent me a friend request and gushed about how wonderful it was to have her best friend of 30 years back in her life.
I am not full of myself but I do have a positive personality and tend to draw people in. I quickly found that my old/new "best friend" was still someone that would fit in my life but I did feel bad for her and tried during 2009 and 2010 to be a friend to her. All it did was bring me down. She would want me to hang out with her but only on her terms, what she wanted to do and never entertained a suggestion from me. If I invited her along to something she suggested something else and if I stuck to my original plans she'd hit facebook with the "I am sick and tired of people that aren't good friends! I'm about to just get rid of these losers!"
If I asked if I had upset her she'd say "NO, it's someone else. Not everything is about YOU." I eventually told her I couldn't be her friend anymore after a situation that once and for all showed to me that I just didn't like her character. (She screwed up at her job and corporate sent the axe down on her. The local managers consoled her and said they didn't want to fire her but that they had no choice as it was a corporate decision. She vowed revenge. Made a fake facebook and emailed the lead manager's wife to let her know about an affair he had the prior year. Called corporate about anything assistant managers had done wrong and 3 of them lost their jobs as well. She was very proud of herself. I just said "I'm sorry...I can't be your friend anymore."
Over the next year she sent mutual friends to me telling me that she missed me. Wanted her "best friend" back. I felt horrible. She didn't have a lot of friends really...not surprising since she talked so horribly about them behind their backs (so I can assume she talked crap about me.) But I let her back in...somewhat. Just a facebook friend.
May 2015, I'd had all I could take. Literally when she is around there is a cloud around me and I feel beaten down. She had picked me up a wine glass at walmart and brought it to my house. After I took possession of it and thanked her she asked me to come assemble some furniture for her. (this was the norm. She'd buy inexpensive things for no reason at all and ask for favors. And you guessed it...if you declined she'd hit facebook again.
I went off. For the first time I told her "BEING YOUR FRIEND BRINGS ME DOWN AND I DON'T WANT TO BE AROUND YOU. I'M SORRY BUT PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE."
Fast forward to November 2016...I get an email from a new account. "My moms best friend passed and she didn't get to say goodbye...and I just wanted to tell you that I love you. I've done a lot of work on myself too so that I can look at life more positively.
I'm an idiot. Why did I NOT BLOCK HER? Within two days she had bought me something and wanted to deliver it. Posting on my facebook wall repeatedly as comments to statuses "I need to bring your birthday gift to you. What day are you off work??" She lives over an hour away now but made dinner and wanted to bring me a plate.
So as I am stupid I met "best friend" in town (didn't tell her where I lived) and we had lunch. And it was okay. Towards the end she started trash talking an old mutual friend of ours but considering that friend was in a public legal mess, I didn't think a lot about it. UNTIL...that night I see a post from that old mutual friend to "best friends" wall...Thank you for having us over for dinner last night! I love you!" So literally the NIGHT BEFORE she had this friend over for dinner and talked about HORRIBLY to me the next day.
She won't go away. As I type she is texting me wanting me to go to an aquarium. I'm a coward. Why can't I just stick to my guns??????? I don't even know what to stop this.
....guess we all learn the hard way at times but if we share our lives with people who share our values and standards, then it gets easier.
just stop talking them and get off social media...like my mom always says social meadia is the devils playground and if she ever contacts you just say your busy and cant talk...but if you are ever feeling suicidal you can always email me at [e-mail address removed] i hope everything is going to be okay and i promise it will be if you just kick those peple out of your life