Angry and pregnant
Things have been going downhill in my relationship for years. We have two young boys together but that is just about all we have in common. Back in July, I told him I wanted him to leave the house, that I was done. He has been cold, vacant, harsh for years. He told me he was sorry, begged for another chance and said he would change admitting the fault in his ways. I am not in love with this man but we do share children, I wanted to give it a shot for the kids at least. One night we had dinner and ended up being romantic(sex) for the first time in many months. I had to force it. I don't feel a connection to him that way and feel like the way he has treated me over the years has made me emotionally shut down to him. A month and a half go by and I discover I am pregnant. We are stocked up with condoms because I cannot use birth control and frankly it is so infrequent that this is just the way it has been. I was shocked to learn I was pregnant and when I asked what happened, if it broke he got really defensive. HE said the condom didn't break so that leaves me with he didn't even put one on. I feel like he did this on purpose to "keep" me. HE knew I didn't want anymore children, he knew I wanted him to go. I am furious and now 15 weeks pregnant and he is still here. HE refuses to leave and I feel so betrayed. He says this isn't his fault and just shrugs it off. HE took my future into his own hands and made decisions for me. And now I am about to be the mother of three children. I can't sleep, I can't eat and I am mad and sad all the time. What the hell am I supposed to do...
This happened to me with my first husband. He saw the pregnancy as another link in the "chain" and was glad it happened.
I made sure I completed my studies and started getting my head together for the inevitable: divorce. (He would not go to counseling and was drunk all the time.)
Did you try counseling to find out why you have fallen out of love with him?
(Please don't be angry. This gives off stress chemicals in your body and it does affect the unborn child.)
I think one of the questions a marriage councilor might ask is what brought you both together to marry each other.