Trapped what can we do
DONSULL - Mar 7 2017 at 12:14
Moved to a 2 bed flat in Torquay and realise we have made a big mistake. We have always lived in a house and I can't adjust to a flat not can my husband. It's a house with 3 flats in it. We moved because we wanted to get away from where we lived because of neighbours and the house was to big with the kids leaving home. We Kepted looking at houses and nothing was what we wanted and we went for one but was told it had gone. Nothing was going right and we had been looking for 5 months which I now realise was a short time and we went for this flat. My husband is a sales man and as to do more travelling and I blame myself because he Kepted saying to take our time but I was desperate to get out. What can we do? I know the landlord will want all the money for 6 months if we leave and we feel so trapped. We can't get a loan anywhere and no one to help or stay with so we are alone. We don't think we can stick it out for 6 months but feel we have no choice. I am crying everyday and on top of this my poor husband as had cancer and it's all getting to me. Even if we say we have to move nearer back home due to hospital appointments the landlord won't care and just want his money. Please please advise and what we can do.
This is Donsull. I forgot to say it's privately rented £670 a month on a fixed term agreement. If we can get another tenant by advertising the property on gum tree etc do you think the landlord would agree to let someone else take over it?
That's too bad and I'm sorry to hear about your husbands sickness along with your other problems. I too made a rash decision and left my home to move closer to my family when I found out I was having my son. We moved into a small apartment and I hated it.
Can you afford to lose the money or will it financially hurt you? Sometimes you have to take drastic measures in order to better yourself. The stress this is causing not only negatively affects your husbands health but your mental health is important as well.
Thankyou for replying. We don't have £3350 to give him for 5 months rent. We gave him £700 for a deposit and we can't afford to pay 2 lots of rent if we moved out to somewhere else. I know it sounds horrible but I was even going to tell the landlord that we have to return closer to home because my husband needs to go for check ups because I am that desperate but the landlord would probably say to go to a closer hospital and wouldn't care about it as long as he gets the rent
Just to add the landlord hasn't took the agreement papers back with him yet, he left them at the flat. so we have his copy and our own, does that make a difference
I guess it would make a difference if those agreements were to be lost...
First, let me share that I’m writing from the United States, I apologize in advance if my choice of words sounds funny. There is no doubt that there are several difficult things going on in your life right now. I pray that things start to improve for you and your husband soon. It’s good that you’re reaching out for any help that people might be able to point you toward.
You wrote mainly about your concerns of being in a flat that you now realize is at best no better than your previous home and perhaps even worse. You also shared that looking back on the decision to move to the flat the five months really wasn’t that much time all things considered.
Taken all together it would seem that perhaps trying to move again quickly might make things worse for the two of you rather than better at this moment. For me personally, when things feel like their spinning out of control slowing down even when that seems impossible has proven to help. I also find that in difficult times praying can be of great comfort. Sometimes when things seem to be at their worst, thinking back to something that has helped with problems in the past can also bring you comfort.
As for your current situation, consider accepting that you’ll be there for the six months but start planning your move to housing that would suit you better after that. By doing this two things might improve. First, by pausing and accepting that this is temporary some of the stress might ease up. The other is that by taking time to plan and consider what type of home the two of you really want gives you something positive to focus on. I don’t know if there are any public charities or churches in your community that might be able to help lift some of your financial concerns or offer other help you might need. . I realize this doesn’t fix everything, but perhaps it will give you and your husband some small bright spot in your lives.