Lonely mom trying to find balance with kids / job / housework
I know I'm not alone. Just trying to find others to connect with in similar situations. I feel like I'm going to explode! I can't seem to do everything that's needed of me. Being a wife, mom, homemaker and work a job. I do it all, just none get my 100%, I just can't. And I fight to get " me time" or adult time. My husband makes me feel guilty for asking for that time. How do you find balance? I'm starting to hate my job, home, my husband and my frustration shows to my kids. Thank you for your help
Your husband should be creating opportunities for you to have 'me time' by sharing the responsibilities of being a working parent, homemaker and spouse. He shouldn't be making you feel guilty because he is, after all, the other part of the equation. You'll find the balance when he contributes his share and more to the household. Easy to say and sometimes much harder to achieve if your husband believes that it's all your responsibility. Sometimes an ultimatum works wonders and your husband needs to understand that if you fall over then it'll be all his responsibility to run the household. You're no good to anyone, including yourself, if your health is suffering from trying to juggle everything alone.
Shell.. quit trying to be supermom. Its tough and you need to give yourself a break. we all try to live up to a standard that is just plain horsepucky lol. You NEED a schedule for the whole family. You didnt say how old your kids were but depending on their age they can help pitch in too. Pair up socks while watching TV, they help and its ice cream later. Its not a job, but it needs done before icecream time lol and they feel like they helped and the whole team accomplished a goal.
First thing you need on your schedule is date night. You BOTH need to get out and get some down time.
depending on what your daily schedules are.. one makes breakfast the other cleans up. Marriage is team work. He might not like doing dishes but hes ok with running a vacuum. Talk to him to see what hes willing to help with.
There is no perfect balance my dear and you have to be ok with just letting some things go. As you get older you learn what stress really is and that a dirty floor is nothing. You will get to that floor after your kids get what they need.
Quick pointers for cleaning: wipe down shower after your done, it cleans faster and easier, wipe down floor on way out.
keep paper towels/ spray btl in almost everyroom for quick tidies. I have a flat abt foot wide flat mop that has a removeable washable head on it. It is a blessing for walls, ceilings and floors and washes after use. Decrease your clutter-takes time to do it but after it makes life easier. Do you really need it and have you used it in the last year. I do alot of 10 min tidies. I pick a project..lets say closets today. In between..look in the closet for only 10 mins..get rid of what you dont need. It may sound silly,,but you will be amazed at what u can actually get done in a few mins. Never tackle big jobs like closets all in one day..do the top of a closet..hanging area...floor area all in seperate days. (Paid housecleaner tips lol)
There are bigger things to stress over than dirt lol good luck
I HEAR you! I appreciate your honesty and sharing your personal struggles with many issues. You are correct. You are never alone! I’ve been through a similar situation. I’m myself a mom, wife, and have wore many “hat” in my life. I’m glad that you see yourself a need to have a “me” time. Everyone needs a break. Have you thought about getting together a “lady” time? It can be once a month, weekly or whenever works for your friends and yourself. I find that very rewarding and help us to vent out our emotions, struggles and having a good time together. It can be a quick weekend trip with ladies. What do you enjoy doing things or have hobby?
For myself I set a time to walk at least three times a week for a hour just to spend time outdoor and also use that time to pray. It’s important for both husband and wife gets their “me” time. I just finished reading a book called “Love Dare” by Stephan and Alex Kendrick. It’s absolutely a wonderful book. It’s a Christian based book talking about marriage struggles and that the love is the center of marriage. This book is a 40 days journey. I’m just giving a tip.
You and your husband are in my prayers.