Desperately seeking advice
I got into a relationship 4 1/2 years ago with someone I knew in my past as friends. When we met he was divorced already but still residing with ex because he stated he wanted to finish raising his son and for financial reasons. His son is graduating this year (he was a year behind). I have seen no effort on his part to show any other commitment to me, not even selling the house, his ex wife retired the end of last school year. I might add he had been with her over 20+ yrs. He had always said he loved me and his ex knew about me and he would alternate his weekends with his son and me. So, I knew she knew about me for sure. He has always said he loves me but I feel is not wanting to go the next step. Should I bail out on this relationship or just wait until May, when his son graduates to see what he is going to do? Or should I just sever the ties now and just walk away?
Regardless if his son graduates in May, this guy would have shown you through his actions his level of commitment to you. If they, his actions, haven't been positive enough and have led you to question them, then your gut instinct is talking to you. One other thing you need to consider is that he may be divorced but is he completely over his ex wife and his marriage?...because if he's not, and his living arrangements make it somewhat murky, then you could be in for a long wait while he sorts his head. When he eventually does this, then the financial side of the equation won't matter.
The man is either with you or he's not and your post basically says that he's not 100% committed, but in fact, he's still connected somewhat to his marriage. You need to consider that when a man truly loves a woman, he'll move heaven and earth to be with her night and day...in other words, he'll make it happen.