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Hi ,i have been married since 10 yrs have 7 year old son , my mil is controlling personality , recently my husbands sister has started working , my mil without asking me & my husband has decided to keep my sil 5 year old son at our house,she lives with her inlaws but still she wants her son to be with us for holidays/weekends/etc . Me and my husband opposed the idea but she is throwing her tantrums.pls suggest am i doing anything wrong expressing my opinion, they should respect our privacy.thank u

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There is nothing wrong with the two of you wanting some privacy. You babysit for her constantly and she has to understand that sometimes you want your privacy. There is nothing wrong with saying no sometimes. You aren't wrong at all

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I am sorry for the family issues but I do understand your point of view. One thing about marriage, it always comes with in-laws. We choose our spouse but not our spouse’s family so there can be some conflicts. We always hope and pray these potential conflicts are minimal and manageable. It’s human nature to want to be in control of our circumstances. The more we have had control in the past, the more it seems, that we are unwilling to give it up. Could this be the case with your mother-in-law? Could this also be the mind set of you and your husband? Perhaps you and your husband can identify the real issue with your mother-in-law. It may not be the 5-year old. If this is control issue, who do you think should be in control of your environment and your privacy? If you decide it will be you and your husband, you can then negotiate from a position of strength. Allowing the opposing point of view is always diplomatic, makes both parties feel good about their position, but still allows you and your husband to make the final decision. I wish you the best in this domestic challenge. Please keep us posted on how it is working for you

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