Need help to come to a decision
ALICE - Apr 1 2017 at 22:12
hi , i am a grl with a bit of not so happy childhood as my dad never liked me , so i have generally been very unloved . now as i grew up i have become over emotional , obstinate and ultra egoistic . About 2 and haf years ago i met a guy at workplace and he seemed to be very perfect , he treated me in d way i never dreamt dat i could be treated , and i thought he was attaracted to me , but then there is another girl he was on similar terms with , even after 2 years he keeps flirting with me but i am in head over heels love with him.Please someboday advice me how to get over him
If you want to get over him, there has to be something else more exciting going on in your life. Good thing that it does not have to be of romantic nature. I am almosr sure that it is not this guy that you want but rather the dreamworld that you have attached to him. But because you fell in love with this dream, you must want that on some leved so forget about how dreamy he is and start finding out what kind of WOMAN a guy like him REALLY want. As in, how would the woman of his life actually fit into his life. That should help you to crush your dependence on that dream and instead turn it into a better understandong of how you can be the kind of woman that that kind of man wants to settle down with, or maybe the insight that that kind of man is not for you.
I think you are to hard on yourself by saying that you are this and that. It is much more likley that this is a behaviour that you have adopted to protect yourself emotionally. Probably it served you better at home with your father and now in places you do not need it it becomes a bothersome habit. Try to learn when and where to use it and I promise you that it will take you further then you thought emotionally and probably even at work.
To get rid of unnessessary egoism you need to copy others behavior a bit. Be nice to the nice and so on. Try to see under the surface of people (even your dad at some point when you feel ready). Often you will find that there is more love there then you originally thought and in the cases you dont it ill be easier to let go.
You will do fine. No matter what happens with this guy there will be more perfect men out there as you develop into a more and more beautiful woman. I am saying good luck just for the heck of it. You will do well in time.