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When He Looks At Me, What Does He See?

Author: Tina Webster
Published: Jul 11 2013

Sometimes, the biggest hurdle in a relationship is the self-esteem of the woman within the relationship. When he looks at me, what does he see? Self-esteem is a concept that has no culture barriers or confinement to geographical location. Women from around the globe can relate to this issue.

What does he see?

What is Self-Esteem

Self esteem is the overall emotional evaluation of a person’s sense of worth http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-esteem. Accordingly, The Diagnostic And Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders-4th ed TR codes Partner Relational Problem(s) as V61.10 defined as, "When the focus of clinical attention has a pattern of interaction between spouses or partners characterized by negative communication, distorted communication (e.g. unrealistic expectations), or withdrawal that is significant impairment in individual(s)…."

Personal insight into one’s own behavior is the key to intervention to ensure that low self-esteem does not become a clinical diagnosis, wherein a person cannot manage their communication with their partner. How we feel about ourselves is often projected by our words. If you have low self-esteem, do not elevate it to a clinical diagnoses wherein a pattern of Relational Problems develop.

Clarity in Perception

If a man thinks the world of you as his significant other, within the context of the relationship, this perception is the only perception you should consume yourself with. Often times, when a woman has low self-esteem, the woman will subconsciously talk her partner out of loving her. Be clear with your partner, do not mix his words. If he says he is attracted to you, then do not doubt him. If he says he loves you, do not allow your perception of yourself to be confused with his perception of you. Be Clear!

Internalize Everything

If you have low self-esteem, you probably internalize everything to make issues much bigger than they have to be. For instance; if your man looks at another beautiful woman and smiles to say hello, do not become threatened with the friendly hello. In these cases, it is important to note that appreciating another woman’s beauty does not take away from the beauty he sees when he looks at you. Similarly, if a man says hello with his eyes it does not mean he is going to leave you for another woman. However, over bearing jealously will cause him to leave the relationship.

Bring Your Inner Beauty Outward

Have you heard that jealously is like salt? A little jealously is just enough, too much will spoil the batch. These are wise words all of us have heard, but the application is the tricky part. You cannot allow insecurities within yourself to become a problem for your partner.

Keeping in mind that all women have the ability to be sexy is your greatest tool. As women we have good hair days and bad hair days. But through it all, we are all equipped with the same tools. Whether its hair, make-up or clothes, you can be just as attractive as the next woman. The inner beauty in all women is the ability to create an atmosphere of beauty, enticement, and sensuality on the outside. Do not be afraid to tap into your beauty-It is within you!

Tina Webster, M.S. writes to encourage young women to love themselves. Tina speaks more about relationships with teens on www.youtube.com/myteencity wherein you will find comedy, entertainment, and real heart filled discussions.

Photo Credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/fran_maiquez/6238681129/

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