Boyfriend refuses to get his hurting tooth checked

It's been bugging him for two weeks now and the pain is only getting worse but no matter how hard I try I can't get him to visit a dentist. He says that he doesn't want to spend money on it and that he's scared the dentist will be mean to him. He claims that he's not scared of pain though. I promised to comfort him and send him all the way to the patient chair and back home, and he still refuses to go there. I have also tried to explain that he shouldn't take mean words seriously if he hears some, that everyone has had a bad tooth in their life and that the toothache is not his fault. He just keeps saying no even though he has enough money for the procedures and continues to whine about the pain at night and skip work. What more can I do to convince him?

You need a man who steps up to be responsible enough to seek medical attention when he needs it. His actions so far should give you a good idea what he's made of. The toothache may or may not be his fault, but it's his fault if he won't do anything about it, particularly when he can afford the procedure. You don't need to comfort a guy who skips work and whinges about a medical issue which is easily fixed by him 'manning up' to achieve it...it's that simple.

It's good that you're being empathic and you sound patient but I think people can get bored and frustrated when someone doesn't help them selves and let it go on for too long, when it's obvious what they need to do. I know I would! But maybe he has a phobia that he doesn't really want to talk about, even if he says he doesn't or hes had a bad experience, could be a pride thing. It will only get worse like you say, he must know that and surely he wants to be out of pain. Still be there for him, go with him (when he hopefully does go) and offer him lifts there, like you have. Also maybe see if there's a more sympathetic dentist he could see, who could put him at ease? Or he could tell the dentist he's a nervous patient? I don't think there anything wrong with admitting that. If not he might just have to ignore the dentists comments if he's not that nice a person for however long he's there for. At worst he could find another dental practice with a nicer dentist and go by other people's review on the website. Maybe do theses things with him but I would get him to do it because if you do it on his behalf and he still doesn't go then that will be annoying. Time for a bit of tough love? :-) and talk to him a bit more seriously about this.

how old is this person!!!!!! (publish his age and then let him read the replies!!!!!) it sounds as though you are either dating a very immature man mentally, or have been landed with some kind of macho idiot. sorry to be so harsh, but how draining to be with someone like this. leave him to his pain and the consequences!!!!! only don't give him any more of your time to listen to it all.