No humanity in human

After my birth when i got senses,my parents specially my father didn't treated me well because i didn't have fair complexion like my others brother and sisters.he always disgraced me infront of family and friends so others also started treated me badly but i thought that one day he will change when i will be good in my studies and my good behaviour will let him change one day i wasted my 20 years to keep him happy in everything.i never was treated like childerns ,i never made any wish to him ,i never slept any night without weeping but there was no love for me.i got admission in country's best university i thought now he will start loving me but he didnt now i was elder so i also ended up thinking about that much like earlier i started living alone and happy with my new friends but every person needs love even animals also so i thought oky thats fine if my family didnt loved me there would be a girl who will be my life partner i will share my love with her than a girl came in my life i started loving her from core my heart ,i did every thing for her ,i left my university papers for her so i can make urgent assignments for her.i shared my money with her no matter if i had to spend two days without eating but she also left me because i wasn't beautiful but she still dont say to me that she had left me but she had abused me ,cursed me many times she still contacts me for her work which has to be completed by me but after completion she doesnt contact me again and all these things i cant discuss here but i am so hurt ,i dont want to live any more in this cruel world but i cant sucide.nobody cares about emotions.nobody caresabout you untill....i cant write any more

I already told you my whole behaved disgracefully when they started watching me day and nights rude and bad behaviour from my dad.