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40 and still alone

Posted by
on Mar 2 2019 at 14:25
Member since: 16 February 2014
Relationship advice Dear people,

I am a workaholic single Asian woman, 40 years ago.

But I am still alone, no boyfriend.

I work hard to pay off my own bills.

I cannot even afford any luxurious vacation or hobbies.

I met some great guys. But they think I am too bored and not pretty enough for them.

They like to try expensive food, playing golf, skiing, sky diving and blah blah blah....

They leave me alone and move on with other women who are willing to spend money on those expensive hobbies and clothes.

I am too small to draw their attention.

What should I do?

I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life.

Any thoughts?

40 and still alone
Reply from
on Mar 6 2019 at 08:26
Member since: 09 August 2017

I think you always choose the wrong person as your partner. Why do you look for people beloging to another social strata? I think this can be a problem. It is understandable that you want to feel safe (physically, financially and emotionally). Do you have any handsome colleagues at your workplace? Since you spend most of your time there maybe you have the highest chance to find somebody like you. You might feel small compared to them because they arent for you. It sound to me that you are forcing this thing to happen ( yes of course I can understand this because of your age) but for now this "relationship searching" is becoming your mania. Take it easy. Maybe If you let it go, in time, he will come.

Give some feedback.


40 and still alone
Reply from
on Mar 6 2019 at 20:22
Member since: 16 February 2014
Hi, BB8 XO,

Sometimes, I think life is not fair.

Since I was in 20's, I have been paying off all bills (school fees, car loan, home mortgage/rent, utilities, my old parents' bills).

My parents cannot afford to help me at all.

I haven't bought myself any nice clothes and etc.

I am working a lot of overtime. I don't have time for vacation. Even I have vacation, I spend my time to take care of my parents.

When my friends are hanging out in evenings, what I am doing is.... working overtime to make my clients happy.

I meet some young single guys from church in the past 20 years on every Sunday morning. They belong to a different social strata than mine.

I meet some single colleagues , but they don't want to date co-workers. They use online dating sites and etc.

For most of my time, I am working hard and being ignored. So sad.

Now, I am 40. Most of my friends are married with kids. They made fun of me for being alone.

I feel bad.

I would love to get married and have two kids. But since I am 40, my dream will mostly never become true.

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