Having to face fact that I wasted my time

I raised some kids investing great time with them but their mother was my maid in Mexico that I brought with me, and when she and the kids left was scared they would love me more than her. She made sure they did not respect me. I thought the kids would grow up and think for themselves but it did not happen and at this point I have my 3 kids and she has four of her own. They think I have done great wrong to their mother and it does not matter what I do they will decide what ever is uncomplimentary to me. It should not hurt but it still does though less as time goes on. But I did so many things for them at such great cost, there is not one I did not save the life or career of, and I did not do things for them to be grateful but I would not have done them to be known as the an evil person either. Anyway it hurt so much to know that I am not invited to recitals and family events that I blocked one of them from my facebook. I know I should not care but I am writing this so obviously I do.

Are they that stupid?

One is a chef for a major hotel, she has an IQ of 75 and I made sure she was in private school. One could not read as he had a disability and I sent him to an exclusive school that specialized in his problem and he learned to read. Now he is an executive travel agent and one could not get above 900 on the two sections of the SATs but went to a foreign medical school and is now a physician married to a physician leading the charge of her mother as a matter of loyalty. Yes they are a bit slow. One sister was not raised by me, she was born afterward and I just baby sat and picked her up from school. She is bright and she joined the marines and believes in it and the evilness of me wholeheartedly. But the answer is they are a bit unthinking.

What do you think are your options?

Well thus far I have just had to adjust my thinking and accept the fact that they will look for ways to hate me and are not my friend. I try to forget them and not be angry. I think that is my only option. If their are others I can not see them. They have no desire to make me happy, imagine I am thinking things that are ridiculous like money means something to me. I cannot defend myself or get mad or be good to them. They want to have an enemy and they were manipulated. Their mother was called the neurotic in the village and I did not listen when I was warned multiple times. I do get mad when they still want to claim it as a blended family. The good excluding me who made it. The end. I would like to move and forget it. But I got married at the age of 42 and he does not. I am stuck with my face ground into shit and it would have been a different story had I moved years ago.

So how do you want to lead your life looking forward starting now?

I think I answered that. Alas it is easier to say than to do. But I try.

Do you mean to "try to forget and not be angry" ?