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Ex gf looking for advice

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I was with my ex gf over a year we really didn't have arguments,but when she needed me most I let her down so badly she had a breakdown,which im totally disgusted with myself ive tried to apologise numerous times but deep down I know she hasn't forgiven me,we were texting but every time we texted I told her I love her and miss her deeply pushing her further away,she started to use the taxi company I worked for knowing it would be me picking her up and on the both times she got taxi we would hold hands and I begged and pleaded with her she kept saying no chance,i have said to her that she is hurting me by using the taxi company as if I knew someone loved me and I didn't feel the same I would go out my way not to use that company so not to hurt her she asked to remain friends I said I couldn't as I still loved her so two weeks ago she blocked me on social media,but two week later when she knew my band was heading over to northern Ireland she unblocked me and went onto my band page and liked some of the pics she then when I came back home go a taxi again knowing it was me picking her up but this time I just acted like I didn't care about her,she is worried about her son going on holiday so I said to her try not to worry and after she had left the taxi I texted her saying not to worry about him and im her if needed and I said enjoy your week-end she text back 8 hrs later jst saying thanks now my work is begininig to question her motives asking why would someone who didn't want anything to do with you unblock you on social media and get taxis knowing it would be me is it down to her breakdown which she hasn't recovered from,is it her way to hurt me more or is she trying to reach out but she hasn't texted me since im totally confused im just wondering if anyone has been through something similar and how did they get there ex back thanks sorry about the long story folks

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