Totally confused

I had an affair with a guy at work. He's married I am single. When he left that evening I didnt hear anything from him or the next day. I messaged him when I got off work. Nothing waited and hour msg him to ask if he was upset with me. His reply I can't talk. Two days later I see him at work I asked how it was going and he said "not good". I said I'm sorry and I walked away. A few days later I seen him and asked are you no longer talking to me. He looked me in the eyes and looked away. I said was me, was it because you shut your cell phone off. He looked at me again in the eyes and calmly said Give IT time. I said ok and walked away. Confused with the give IT time as he didnt say give ME time (wth does this mean) Later that day before we went home from work he walked by my desk looked at me and said hi. I said hello back. A week passed no online contact. Monday at worked he walked by my coworker and I and said good evening ladies. A few days passed his wife sends me a msg saying I'm probably aware of her. That my self esteem is high but I lack self respect and she would enjoy meeting me. (I did not feel threatened but confused) I have not dated in years and dont know what to think. Yes he and I are to blame. No children involved as they are grown. And I gave stopped giving him any attention and did not reply to the message his wife sent. I dont know what to think about any of this.

Yeah, you're wasting your time having an affair with a married guy especially in the workplace. He's connected and you're not...means he'll use you, and has already btw, and tells you to give 'it' time but there's no room for 'you' in it. You're the third wheel and you're the one who's going to get hurt and who knows, you may end up changing jobs all because of a married man. Not worth the hassle or your time. He has issues with his marriage and its his marriage to sort. In the meantime, you don't have to be his plaything to use when it suits him. His actions tell you everything.