Am I being inconsiderate or is he overreacting?
VERONICA0702 - Dec 8 2019 at 19:20
Is he expecting me to be someone different? He says I don’t validate his feelings. We live together and in our mid 30’s. Some examples include:
Me not apologizing for taking up both parking spots and him having to wait a few minutes for me to move. I didn’t know he was coming home. He says I never listen.
When he has 3 days off of work, I made plans for a few hours with a friend and planned on spending rest of time with him he says it’s not enough and I should have asked what we were doing first cause he’s rarely off. I even had surprised him with tickets to a game the next day and had to tell him early cause he was upset.
I took the dog out for an hour and he left saying he’s not my doormat and he’s not waiting around for me. It was early and I figured when I got back we’d do something. It’s a Sunday and he does watch the games. He says by taking dog out I cut into our time together cause he’ll be gone most of day. Again he didn’t give me a chance to suggest something. He says I assume too much.
I feel like I can’t do anything right. I’m trying to be more considerate of his feelings but I’m not gonna apologize for something I don’t see as an issue. Is it me?!
No, you're not being incondiderate, in fact it's your man who's assuming too much and expecting you to do everything to suit him. Yeah, that's fine that he works but so do you. You work on your relationship whereas your man just expects you to do everything so that he's happy.
A bit more communication with each other will see you guys work it out and you're doing the little unexpected things for him (surprise things we do for our partners) which he needs to learn to apprecicate. Then he wouldn't need to feel like a doormat.
Validation is showing a carefactor and an appreciation for each other, and going by your post, is something which your man doesn't really understand.