31 and struggling to make friends
I'm writing here because I'm lonely and drifting through life without any meaningful friendships. I've recently, in the last six months, gotten into a more serious job with a future. I'm good at it and I do enjoy. But it's all I do and I've come to hate weekends.
I've recently fallen out with friends for several reasons including their racism (not directed at me) and their aggression. But I've taken positive steps outside of work too. I've started a band with a few new people I've met and I'm trying to set up a meet up group in my local area. But I'm still spending any time I'm not at work (Where I can be painfully shy) or the two hours a week jamming with the band, alone in my room. I am constantly cancelled on every time I try and arrange anything social outside of this band and I feel so lonely and like my life is passing me by.
I'm coming off a year long course of anti depressants carefully and slowly. I'm quite chipper in person and I haven't admitted my lonelielness to anyone else in a long while. I just want friends I can see regularly, more than 2 hours once a week but I don't feel like people gravitate to me as a person. I feel empty and boring. Any advice anyone?
I know this isn't a dire situation but if someone has any words of advice and encouragement I'd be grateful.