Reconnection with a former student

I've been an elementary school teacher for 18 years. A few months ago, a young lady who I'd had as a student for several years early in my career moved back to our town. She looked me up and asked if I wanted to go for coffee and catch up a little, and I agreed. We met, and what was supposed to be just a short meetup for coffee turned into three hours during which we made an unexpected connection. We ended up going back to my place where, as you may have guessed, we had sex. During the last few months, we've been out a few more times together and we've ended the evening with sex each time. We really enjoy spending time together, and the sex is mind blowing, but we have mixed feelings about whether we really want to be a couple, mainly because of what some other people might think. I am 40 years old and she is 24. We're debating whether we should just be out and open as a couple, keep doing what we're doing privately or just break it off altogether

Age is just a number. If you were both single and now happy together as a genuine couple, there shouldn't be any issues. Sure, people may talk and judge you, but it's none of their business. Rest assured, if you've been out a few times already together, then there's people who will have noticed by now.

I like the way you think, manalone. It's not really the age difference we expect people might have a problem with, but the dynamic of our previous relationship as student and teacher. We don't think that should matter, although we know it is a little unusual, but you know how some people are.

Hi BIGJAY5. This sounds like an issue that many of us would like to have. I agree age difference is not a factor if you are both emotionally mature enough to handle a romantic relationship. I also would suggest some past prohibitive relationships may not be prohibitive now. If the two of you are indeed interested in developing a long term relationship, perhaps you should try removing the sexual behavior. That behavior can easily cloud one's objectivity. I believe there are profound and spiritual reasons why we are encouraged to wait for a sexual relationship with someone we are attracted to until a promise is made to each other. This is usually done with marriage. This may sound prudish even like preaching, but if you are both truly interested in a long term relationship, regardless of other's perceptions, find values and characteristics in each other that are compatible and will sustain your love for a life time. Let us know if this is at all possible and how that turns out.