I feel my older brother is acting over tempered
ANONNNN - May 26 2020 at 06:33
This is my first time on this site since I'm kind of in a situation where I may need guidance. Also, I apologize for the bad grammar or spelling, I have no excuse I just type too fast heheh.
So I have an older brother, 4 years apart from me, and I'm the younger sister. We still live together along with parents and we grew a great life with each other and very minimal complications. I'm blessed and grateful
My brother enjoys video games, chatting with friends, and so forth but lately it has been becoming excessive. His temper has been growing, he's getting bags under his eyes, if we regard his health, he'll just brush it off, etc. There is more I can list but for the sake of this post I'll keep it here.
He yells a lot due to adrenaline in games, which is usually in the range of my family's sleeping pattern. So, yeah, I haven't been sleeping well for the past month. Starting to get bags under my eyes too :/ I've told him many times, even secretly turning off the wifi because I couldn't take it anymore.
As I'm typing this he's yelling at my mum, and he lashed out on us four times in a row. It's been like his personality was first quiet, nice, angry, then understanding. It gets really confusing to me. We've been raised very well, which makes me feel bad for my mum and everyone else to deal with this. I wouldn't deny he's been pampered for being the older brother and all but this is getting too much. I'm worried about his health. A few months ago we got a health scare because of the way he's been treating himself.
I'm worried how long his patterns of rarely getting sleep, anger, and the distance away from us will carry on. I feel awkward just being with him because of all the yelling he's done to me. His weird patterns hasn't started long ago but I don't know how it started. He was never like this before. Our relationship never drifted this far before despite living in the same household.
There will be moments when we have good times, but many bad times have started to occur. It's driving me crazy just with him yelling right now. I really want this to change and I am almost positive we should give him help but, I just don't know. My parents are trying to take precautions but he's denying. He's an adult.
His temper has grown to something inconceivable. It gets scary by how descriptive the words he say out of his mouth can be. As he grown, he drifted farther and farther away from them and me and spending more time with his friends. Now I know everyone needs people in their life, but as family, we are beginning to get more and more bad moments together.
It getting harder and harder to stay with him, as if he owns this household. I know sure if he needs professional help, he most likely does, but I need to know if there's a way to settle this before that step. As the younger, I'm genuinely worried.
I hope this wasn't too long, this is my first time expressing these feelings. I'm not sure if I'm doing the right thing typing here but confronting him is getting out of hand and not working.
Thank you for anyone reading this :) It feels nice even just to type my feelings out since I'm not one who speaks often.
Hi,
Yeah, game consoles can cause some people to react like this and it’s not good for their health (can cause fits) if they constantly play on them or their wellbeing . It’s a whole other world that people can get drawn into and lost in. Why I don’t like them!
You’re right you’re brother does need help into why he’s reacting like this especially if his whole personality has changed. He needs to take responsibility for how he’s treating his family members because he can’t continue to speak to you all like this, something is wrong.
Having a health scare clearly hasn’t made him stop of think about what he’s doing. Counselling will help if he’s willing to go.
If it’s not his house then maybe you’re parents can take control of the wifi? And you can all help him (along with a counsellor) to find another distraction.
Thank you for the help!
Video games really do weird things to people
His personality is odd outbursts at random times, as if he's holding in emotions. I really wish he realizes what he says to us but he's becoming more selfish and ignorant, which I think him taking responsibility will make be surprising.
I do want him to get professional help but my parents don't agree (yet) to getting him that help, I believe they think they can handle his actions but the past three days have been the worst I've seen.
I'll chat with my parents about this. I think restrictions on wifi will be necessary now, and we'll talk to him more if he's willing to share what he has in his mind as a family. That's a start and thank you on our output. Again its my first time and you've been helpful :)