Why is she so cold

Hi I’m in relationship with over 3 years with a lady. And she lives abroad so different cultures etc. She always says things to hurt me and I keep telling her to stop. It’s like she don’t care. Now I do everything for this lady Financial support Holidays etc. If I say to her your words are hurting me she always says I’m not hurting you. Now we had o huge argument the other night and I hung up the phone. She message me next day saying good morning i saw the message but haven’t opened it. I hope this silent treatment will work. Because previous arguments I just text her back. And all is ok for few weeks. Then Happens again. My question is how to make this lady understand that her words are hurtful

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