Hello,this story will be long but i will try to keep it short as i can,but it's important to get all the details out so if some of you have advice for me it would be better that you get whole story.
So,story goes long way back when i was a secound year of my high school life,in my country we have 4 years of high school system,and there was this girl i really fell for,after abouth a month of sorting my feelings,i decided to confess to her,and i got rejected,but with pronounce that we will stay friends(this sentence has cost me 7 years of my love life now,i'm 22 now)
That was how it all started,and after that rejection i though to myself,this was it,but man was i wrong,after that she got in a relationship with someone other,but to my suprise she started to message me first and keep contact with me,i even tried to push her away by talking some stuff about her out of spite,but she forgave me and still talked to me after always initiating contact first,we kept this friendzone thing going for very long and there was many times we would argue about what are we really but she always would tell me we are friends noting else and get mad,than start to initiate contact again,witch was absurd to me because she would message me every day and tease me so much about love and other things(at one instance we were at friends birthday and she kissed with 2 other random guys while rejecting me later telling me she was drunk witch hurt me like nothing else in my life)and this went on like this untill we finished high school,at witch point we went our seperate ways and i started to forget about her,so after a year i would say i was pretty okay and i started to forget her even tho she would message me from time to time.
So when COVID pandemic hit,she started making contact more agressivly and talking more with me giving me hints she is free now and teasing me how it would be nice to be my wife etc,and abouth a month ago witch would be after 4 years since we finished high school,we decided to meet up...
I was very much more mature now and more handsome than i was in high school,i had a car,income and everything i was not a little boy anymore,so we met up,she seemed so happy to see me after all that time,we talked a lot and than i finaly asked her to come to my place,and to my suprise she accepted,she even met my parents by accident,but than...When we were in my room i asked her does she want to be with me and again like all those years ago i got a NO,that really shattered me because i really thought she changed her mind so i kinda desperatly tried to convince her but after all she still didn't want to do it,i tried to kiss her few times but she rejected,so we stoped,ate something in my place and i drove her home,there i asked her again and she said she will think about it,and i tried to kiss her few more times and she kinda agreed 1 time but it felt forced,than a week after she messages me and says she doesn't want a relationship with me,witch shattered me into pieces,so to summer it up...
I did so much for this girl through our years of knowing each other,i helped her with so much stuff and was there for her when needed,now i'm shattered that after all that she refuses to give me chance like she did to many others that were nothing to her,i know after reading this myself that i'm biggest moron on face of the earth for allowing this,but i can't help it i'm not used to pushing people away from me forcefully,so i ask you this-What should i do now,do i stop every contact with her and block her if she tries to talk to me again?I know i will move on as times goes on but i'm afraid of going back to this circle again,can someone share their point of view and advice on this?Sorry for long story but i had to write it.
My friend I can feel the pain hidden in your question You cant force someone to love you, no one to love intentionally, it's a feelings automatically develop from inside of the heart keep her in your friend list because she like you she don't want to lose you. but unfortunately she is unable to develop a love towards you that you need … and move on in your life I don't suggest to stop for her. may be when she saw you with someone then she feel jealous and that jealousy help her to discovered these feelings that you need
All the very best of luck (Y) (A)
"You can't force someone to love, no one do love intentionally,
it's a feeling that automatically born inside the heart"