Hurt and lonely

My boyfriend is alot older than me, we have a one year old son and I love him very much.We are both religious people. I am a reserved person, i love my family and going to church. Love to laugh and spending time with people that have a sense of humour and that can inspire me to grow spiritually. I am very fragile, but because i have been hurt so badly in life i have put a wall and act tough. He has days where he spoils me and makes me feel like a princess but at times he makes me feel so stupid and lashes out at me but in a very subtle manner. I just keep quiet and tell myself it's because he is under pressure at work so i should just support him and pray for him and things to get better at work. when i raise a concern he makes it sound petty. I was recently approached by a friend of mine for a fashion show for fuller figure wormen. I refused because i am shy when it comes to those things and i didnt feel comfortable. I told him all of this that i didnt see myself doing that. She again came and begged me and explained that there will only be women and will will not be more than 3min, i again told him. Then he said if i want to support her i should. I agreed on the day of the fashion show. He shouted at me that when i said i didnt see myself doing that he believed me that i respected myself and now i was parading infront of men. I tried to explain but he didnt want to hear of it. then i raised my voice (for the first time). He told me if i ever raise my voice at him, i will see and he will treat as that type of person. I feel so hurt and insulted because to me it feels as if he sees me as this cheap person. He hasnt called since, i tried to call him but you can hear he is not in the mood to talk to me. Please advise, what should i do.

So sorry to read your problem. I'm no expert...but on HIS part..jealousy and insecurity come to mind? In my experience..sometimes this is how men show their feelings. I have experienced a lot of what you have mentioned. And it's not nice. It's undermining and intimidating. Have you told him how he makes you feel? You are worth more than this, and deserve so much more respect. But please..do not let this negativity drag you down. You must leave, or find a way to correct this. Could you not maybe stay with friends or family for a little while, get some breathing space? It may be what you both need. Even for a couple of nights. We only live one life...and we ALL deserve to be happy. Regards, Charmaine

SPHO, From this man's point of view (I'm 49 & married) you don't need to continue in a relationship where you are feeling under valued. I concur with Charmaine's comments (getting dragged down). Don't short your happiness. God bless.