Puzzled by his attitude

Husband has ED since his heart attack 3 years ago. Short story is that due to my frustration he told me to find a boyfriend. found that a bit insulting, but after 2 years of no sex and quite by accident I found one, a perfect FWB. Now I am sort of upset that my husband has displayed absolutely no jealousy. I know that it would bother me, and for the majority of marriage he constantly pestered me for sex. I am puzzled

If I couldn't perform I'd be frustrated. Suggesting a FWB would be a humiliating and desperate last resort to save the marriage. Maybe his indifference is dissociation/de-involvement from the situation. Everyone handles stress differently and he could be really hurting inside even if it's not externally evident. Just a male perspective based on the information you provided. My ex-girlfriend was an adulterous succubus who made me feel like trash sometimes when I didn't want sex as much as she did, and that disconnect between us conjured up lots of different emotions during our time together.

I think you should express how that makes you feel when he shows no sign of jelousy on the flip he may be doing it since he is worried you would leave him and he think that is the only resolution that he can think so he does not loose you. I can not answer on behalf of him. However, I think just having a real one on one chat discussing your feelings and emotions about this will go a long way :) I wish you the best of luck! Keep us posted if you can :) Stay Safe & Stay Healthy! Alex