Falsely accused of cheating & now falsely accused of being in a porn

So my ex (i guess)- and I were together from when I was 18 years old up until a few days before my 31st birthday. He dumped me. Yet still lives here with our kids and me. The oldest kid is only freshly 11 so it's not as if I'm fully against this living arrangement bc I would never forgive him if he went ghost on his kids, one of which didn't make it past her birth so she's in heaven. We went through that together right by eachothers side. In 2016 he accused me of cheating (the first time to where he actually 100% believed it and was furious and wanted to leave) . I didn't cheat on him. A really big event happened that year and I was terrified. I tried in the ways I know how to tell him how it was effecting me and how I needed his support. I don't think he really heard me. My brother was around and he's a bad influence on me. The stuff that lead up to him believing that in 2016 was completely understandable and I still tell him that I will never tell anyone any different. He had every right but it still doesn't make it true. I explained everything I could to him regarding the situation but when the truth is just your everyday life experiences or whatever ppl tend to think its a lie bc they're expecting a HUGE event to match their perception... Fast forward to 2020. I start work at Amazon. I hadn't worked since 2017 and then it was only a little while less than 3 months. He thought I was cheating then. Really bad. Worse this time. Time clock would scan my badge more than once and it would clock me out and I didn't know it until I got summoned via scanner to hr bc I was working off clock . This happened more than once. But he never believed me. Once or twice accusing me of having relations with the hr dude. When you're late at this job you get an email for 1 minute pass ur scheduled time. 1 min to 29 min or 30 min is 0.5 points or back then u could use a late pass and unpaid time points. 30 min to 1 hr is 1.0 point . Unpaid time is used in one hour increments even if you are 1 min late and are working. He kept reading them wrong and swears it says I was one hour or more late or I was 30 min late. If I clocked in from lunch and the time clock did its crazy thing it would generate an email saying I left work early. They ended up fixing my points and late passed as well bc they changed my clock in time by 15 minutes but didn't fix it in the system. So every day I was getting emails I was late and the clock out time changed too so it would say I was leaving early. He and I had the biggest fight of our lifetime in 2020. . I leave work. Go back 1 month or so later. Leave again over other problems unrelated. 2021 till now he started going back on the road. He would tell me that he could tell someone came by bc of the leafs on our driveway. Tire tracks. He claimed he saw boot prints. He wears boots .but swears they were fresh. He'd call me and have me FaceTime to show him no one was here or the driveway didn't have marks. If I missed a call or took too long to answer a FaceTime he would tell me I was getting it on with someone. He'd say "u think im stupid " and so many things. I go back to the job I had before jan 1 2022. Every night I left for work on 3rd shift and when I came home and when I woke up I would hear it from him. He said that for months he watched me, my brother, and an old friend from school all be active on fb messagener at the same time and go offline together. He says that I was using my brothers accounts to talk to this guy. That if my fb messenger photo goes back to an old pic like it tends to on its own for some reason that meant i was in incognito mode! Or vamish mode! I tried to show him that if I was in incognito or using vanish mode on there it wouldn't show to anyone. Vanish mode would show the other person my pic changing or something idk why it does that. He says I was using the "cloud" to use apps on my phone without actually downloading them on my phone itself and the apps were for scrambling numbers, casting my Google location. And I was having my "boyfriend" call his phone too under numbers that popped up Spam or something bc of our call filter spam detector thing. He said that u can change a number to anything u want and use it to call ppl. I know u can get free numbers from apps and u can fake a text number but I read its illegal to spoof calls. And idk how to do it. He swears the notes I took on how to use Linux, cmd, and different methods of testing yr security and how to get info on numbers and fb accounts that all the notes were actually about how I was hacking his phone from the cloud and doing this with the numbers. He told me a long time ago maybe 2 years. That his worse fear is finding me on the adult video site.. basically me cheating and it being recorded thus uploaded. Well I come home and of course... in Jan or Feb he told me look I found u on there . And u can't see a face . At all. He swears the Keychain have items that are specific to me and him like a pendant and certain color landyards. Yellow new car tag thing on the keys. He makes up cars we never had . We had 1 rental and he swears his uncle let us use his one day and even his uncle says no. Bc I found out what car the ppl in the video are in . And we've never owned one ever or driven one. He says he can see my scars on the specific parts of my legs. The hands of the girls are boney, small and u can see her veins and her knuckles poke out well. They look like mine. He says he knows how I sound after 14 years together..bc the video she doesn't talk just make noises he says he knows the guy and its the guy from our neighborhood gas station. He swears the guy lives across the street from th store and drives a white mustang. All bc I told him a while ago I saw the guy riding a skateboard towards work like he was leaving his area which wasn't where the house and store are. The mustang he swears he drives he says its been captured on Google maps in our neighbors driveway. There is a white car on Google maps there. But the two cars sunroofs are OBVIOUSLY not even close to the same. He says I had a shirt I never had. And he mixed it up with the time he saw dude at the store wearing a shirt and he says hey he has ur shirt and I said I got it from Walmart I've seen 100s of ppl with it. It's an anime shirt. He told a different person different time same store that he liked his shirt. Well he's putting these 2 times together and saying it was dude and tha the shirt in the video is the shirt he was pointing to that day and that he found the shirt in our bathroom and he asked me about it. ... he says men's clothes show up all the time especially when he's out of town but his friends have given us bags of kid boy clothes and men's clothes and some shirts that could be men or women. I beg him to go through the clothes with me so he doesn't forget them and accuse me. But no. He forgets what I buy him to wear too and says it's not his. He says I told him I saw this guy at my work. He literally took a convo I had with him about a mutual friend . Word for word. But he says im gaslighting him trying to make him think his memory is bad. He calls me every name in the book. In front of our kids. He screams in my face. I try to walk off and when I do im going to delete stuff or im talking to dude. I can't cry, get angry or have no expression bc all of them is me being manipulating, angry is guilt, and nothing is me being a monster. I'm a narcissist sociopath. Bc he begs me for the truth or he'll tell me that I used him, I refuse to admit guilt,I am too childish to admit when I did something. That all he wants is the truth and an apology and he could've kept being with me but if I can't do that it means I didn't care about what I did. If I ever loved or respected him I would tell him the truth. That I have messed him up so bad that all he wants is answers and he'll be okay begging me to give it to him. WHAT DOES ONE DO WHEN YOURE FACED WITH STUFF THIS HORRIBLE THAT YOU DIDNT DO AND YOUR 14 YR RELATIONSHIP IS TAKEN BC OF IT UR KIDS ARE AFFECTED YOU SEE THE PERSON U LOVE HURT SO BAD HE CANT GO ONE NIGHT WITHOUT HAVING A BAD DREAM ABOUT IT. U HAVE SEEN HIM SHED TEARS OVER IT. U LOVE HIM . U NEVER WANTED TO LOSE HIM. U KNW AND UNDERSTAND HIS INSECURITIES AND U KNOW THAT U SHOULDVE BEEN MORE ENGAGED AND NOT BELIEVE THAT JUST BC UR NOT CHEATING AND UR JUST TIRED OR DISTRACTED WITH SOMETHING ON UR MIND, OR WHATEVER THAT IT COULD BE MISCONSTRUED. he literally believes I dyed my hair red bc he likes red heads so it made me mad enough to dye it, and then record the video like it so he would find it. Wtf?! My hairs never been long and red ever. Only after I cut it and dyed it blonde and grey a lot.. he thinks when I tried to spice us up that I was doing it bc the guy he thinks i cheated with did it to me and I brought it home. When he knows I've always liked certain things. The girl in the video has an account on the site with other videos and pics. I found out that she has a small birth mark one side of her bottom. He claims I do too and that ita not a birth mark its a indentation from cellulite causing a shadow. But u can see it in outside lighting, inside light, bathroom light, any angle of camera and any stance!!!!!!!!!!! Im done ranting I doubt anyone will read all this. Lol

My advice to you, forget about lost money and other things, just close the chapter and hear the silence and then slowly say to yourself I can do everything three times, I'll explain why it's worth forgetting about business and money the answer, no matter how bonalno money tends to end and business, too, but not the point, just knowing from my experience every time I lost money or bought something for them, it could be anything, but I always remembered that this money spent or taperenye not immediately return, of course, but to return two times more than I lost them initially

I am surprised that after such words and accusations, you allow him to be present in your life. Relationships are about respect and trust, about hope and mutual efforts. And what this man is doing is unthinkable. It's better to think about present you, do everything so that such things don't happen to you again, so that bastards don't meet on your way. Love is love, it can fade away. Howeever if there was respect, such bullshit wouldn't happen.

Remember it is only cheatin IF U get caught. Otherwise U R simply, gettin-away with it.