Should I give up on my partner or see if he changes

So I've been in a relationship with my partner for 3 years we have a one year old together and I have two other children of my own we live with his parents and support them I pay half the bills and he pays half. I need advice on how long I should wait to start getting my own home he keeps saying we will get a house but I don't think he wants to leave his parents. He treats all my kids good and he's a good dad, however I don't feel like he's really into me. Feels like he's just with me because of the baby he never wants to be alone with me. He has his parents go on every vacation with us if I tell him I want a couples trip together or just a date night I don't care what he gives me excuses but he talks about wanting to take his dad fishing. The first two years of our relationship and during my pregnancy he was talking to his Ex and when I confronted him he blamed me for snooping in his social media and knew I did it so he talked to her. Anyways the past year he said he would change and I did see improvement so I decided to forgive. Now though I don't see improvement in affection we are always together he doesn't go out and he helps me with kids but I try communication but it goes nowhere. The other day marriage came up( he brought it up) saying he don't believe in marriage because the government messed over the man when you get divorced. So of course I always wanted to get married but he obviously don't want to nor it seems he's more concerned of his parents which aren't disabled they' have retirement but has me and him take care of them. Should I wait another year and see if we do get a place or just start looking myself. He says we can't get a place because we have to save more money but he's paying for his parents food, clothes bills vacation everything.he don't even tell me he loves me just calls me honey and he'll even just text me

This man can be good with the kids & pay his parents way etc etc but is it what you need? The one thing you have to look at is that you can't expect him to change, you have to accept him as he is & if you can't, then it's time you went & looked a place on your own. There's nothing wrong with talking to his ex as long as you know about it & his seriously laughable BS about it's your fault for snooping is just that..BS. You need to follow your gut & go & do what will make you happy & secure because this man's actions are doing the talking in your 'relationship' with him.

It sounds like things are hard for you. On the one hand, your dad is nice to your kids and helps you with everything. On the other hand, you don't feel the love and care you want from your partner, and you're not sure if he wants to be with you because of the baby or because he really wants to be with you. Although your desire to move in together and begin your own life is completely reasonable, it appears that he is not yet prepared to do so. He might want to stay with his parents for his own reasons, but it's important that you tell him what you want and need. If he's not willing to talk about your future together and what you both want, you might want to start looking for your own place. It's important to put your own happiness and that of your kids ahead of everything else. As for the marriage question, it's up to you to decide if it's a deal-breaker or not. If you've always wanted to get married but he's not interested, you should talk to him about it and see if you can come to an agreement or if it's something you can't.

I would suggest trying to become desirable to him again by showing that there are other men around who find you attractive and wouldn't mind being with you. Create a sense of scarcity, using the principles of salesmanship :)

Okay like work on myself Thank you

Stop looking at his 'potential.' He doesn't want to leave Mommy and Daddy, and he doesn't want to get married. Period. This is the man-child he is today. You've given this relationship three years. There is no motivation for HIM to change. He's getting what he wants. Mommy probably still cuts the crusts of his sammies, and you provide sex. He doesn't have to bear the entire cost of, or make the decisions about maintaining a home, because the home belongs to his parents and they have some say. And truthfully - that you or I want someone to change doesn't obligate someone else to do that. He can pursue the life he wants. You dont have the power to change him, either. None of us do. You can choose to stay, or you can decide this is a deal-breaker and move out and on. I don't think you need to 'work on yourself' to make yourself more desirable. He's just not interested in a more intimate, mature relationship. That's NOT YOUR FAULT.