What should I do?

So I’m due to get married in just little over a month. On Saturday I had a huge argument with my partner and told her the wedding was off. After a few hours we decided that I would take some time away to think things over. It’s been a few days now and I still don’t know what I should do. I guess I should start from the beginning. We have been together for a little over 3 & half years now. We met and things hit it off straight away. The problems didn’t start until it was time to meet the family. To me family is important I have lost so much that it’s important to hang onto what I have left. For my partner she used to be close to her brothers and there partners but as time went on they moved out start new jobs and now they only talk every so often. The day came when she meet my mam it went wellbut with my sister she took an immediate disliking to her. Didn’t think to much of it at the time as it was first meet they are completely different people just thought that they got off on the wrong foot and they would get to know each other better as time goes on. Another thing I started to notice is that she was not very out going turns out she has bad anxiety and doesn’t like to mingle much. She worries to much about what she does. Me and my sister are close and she would ring me every day practically to see how things are but my partner would not like that she started to complain or tell me not to answer the phone when they called. If I was going to see them she would make excuses up saying she was not very well or stop us from going round. We came up with the plan that I would stay with her some days the other with my family. This worked well for awhile but on the nights I was at home she would want to know what I was doing constantly ring or text me. If I did something she did not like she would insist on coming over or pretend she was not well and say that I did not care about her if I did not go and see her. Things got to the point where I was ready to walk away. She promised to cool things down and things got better. Moving on and the topic started to change to when are you going to propose me. At the time I was not ready but as the years passed friends where getting married and everyone was asking when was I got to propose. I started to think maybe I should and so decided to propose last year. Things started to move fast from there and we where planning for the big day. Started out well but as things started to slow she started to have the problem with my family again seemed worse then ever. For the last couple of months I have felt like my heart has not been into the wedding any more. When an outing turn bad with us and my family on Saturday that’s when I called it all off. She blames the issue on stress and promises that it won’t happen again. But it’s to close to the wedding to see if she can keep things going and even if she does manage can I trust it’s not an act until we get married. I know I have not painted a very good picture of her but all been said when it’s just the two of us we do get on well. I just don’t know if it’s enough. Now the twist a new starter at work I met took my breath away from the moment we met this is not me at all I only ever fall for one person at a time. But as the weeks go by the more feelings I have for her. Now I’m left wondering if I have those feelings does it mean it’s too late for me and my wife to be. Would love to hear some opinions on what to do.

Hi WhatDoIDo, Thanks for your patience (I think our regulars must be on holiday or ill; it seems to be just me) (PS feel free to give others waiting your thoughts and opinion if you fancy it? Might well help further open your widening eyes....plus I like your writing style, "Spidey Senses" and ability to remain calm under-fire. :)) Anyhoo...to biz: "I know I have not painted a very good picture of her but all been said when it’s just the two of us we do get on well." What a contrast, eh? This is because those are the times when she's got you all alone and to herself. What are your thoughts on this? Questions: 1. How old are you, she and your sister? 2. Has your sister ever taken an instant dislike to one of your girlfriends or friends before? 3. Define 'hit it off immediately' in terms both of romantic/chemistry-intensity out of 10 and pace of falling in-love in months/weeks/days? 4. Can you go into detail re her first meeting with your (divorced & single?) mum and sister? (PS: you're totally anonymous...too many other Yous out there with the exact same problem and situation, no worries.) 5. Ditto re what went wrong and how during this Saturday family outing? 6. Can I make a wild guess and posit, that these troubles either began or became (collectively) apparent around about the 2 year point? 7. If you had to have a guess, would you assume I'm feeling really quite sorry for you at the mo? (See what I did there? ;))

PS: Sorry-sorry.sorry, I need to burp out a toxin: "She promised *to cool things down* and things got better. Moving on and the topic started to change to when are you going to propose me." My response: HAH! If THAT'S her idea of cooling things down (and logically warming-up again gradually), I'd hate to see her idea of hotting things up?! PPS: "Now the twist a new starter at work I met took my breath away from the moment we met this is not me at all I only ever fall for one person at a time. But as the weeks go by the more feelings I have for her. Now I’m left wondering if I have those feelings does it mean it’s too late for me and my wife to be." Would love to hear some opinions on what to do." It's very common. I call it, catching a human Taxi outta there! And I don't blame you. HOWEVER, take it very, very slooooooooowly. One, you don't want to be a cheating beep-beep and, two, it could make things so much worse (than they already are). If your underlying reason (extremeley common again) (i.e. YES) is to get an insta-shot of the thus-far lost confidence this would give you - to augment what's been eroded - let's call it, adding Turbo to your vehicular self - there are many-many other ways to ready for 'battle'. I could pelt them at you if you like, and have you ready in 2 weeks! Aside from any of the above details, however, my opinion is: NO. You should NOT go ahead with marrying her. You should never marry *anyone* you're not gagging and overjoyed to start spending the rest of your LIFE with. In my opinion and experience, Cold Feet are just code for - Uh-oh, summat's very wrong (obviously) and/or they're not ready (obviously). And, like ANY-THING, it's about Degrees Of. And your 'feet' say: No Already. But come back to me, anyway. Because there's so much more to this.