I didnt mean to fall in love im so happy but in dire need of advice

I M21 have a girlfriend F23 long distance in China but met in the uk, I'm in the UK, for just over a year. I, 5 months ago met someone out of the blue and she is F16 which ik sounds concerning, but is both legal here and in the US where she resides, she is far more mature than her age, and we have her parents full approval. She is everything I've wanted in a relationship. I met her only recently in person and we just were a house on fire and I met her whole family and everyone even the grandparents approve. Her mum and stepdad met when she was 16 and he was 25 so they are more accepting and I'm sure I'll get a lot of heat for her being 16. Any younger and I would never have gotten feelings. I've never broken up with someone before and was so scared to and now I feel stuck. I wanted to travel to meet her and I haven't lost feelings fully for her and I am so terrified of hurting her and disappointing her family. I am also terrified of what my family will think of me having a girlfriend that is 16 as my stepsister was 16 and pregnant from a 19 year old. They were furious, more so at the stupidity of the more responsible male being irresponsible and her being pregnant so I hope they would approve and if not I don't really mind and will continue anyway as my parents were always so controlling of my life. And now I have my right to autonomy of course I want their approval and won't be so happy if I don't but I will do what's best for me and makes me happiest. Please help and how on earth can I let F23 down gently as I know she has suicidal thoughts etc that's the main reason I feel stuck because I do care for her as a person she never did anything wrong I just fell for someone else.

Hi IH01, (LOL, how do you pronounce that?) "I've never broken up with someone before and was so scared to and now I feel stuck. I wanted to travel to meet her and I haven't lost feelings fully for her and I am so terrified of hurting her and disappointing her family. I am also terrified of what my family will think of me having a girlfriend that is 16 as my stepsister was 16 and pregnant from a 19 year old. They were furious, more so at the stupidity of the more responsible male being irresponsible and her being pregnant so I hope they would approve and if not I don't really mind and will continue anyway as my parents were always so controlling of my life. And now I have my right to autonomy of course I want their approval and won't be so happy if I don't but I will do what's best for me and makes me happiest." You're 21. You've entered through the gates of Adulthood into Adult Land. Same in China, yes? Certainly nowadays, now that the world is becoming more 'globally' cultural? It's your life. Exclusively. Simple solution: ensure you don't get her pregnant, by taking responsibility for your own contraception regardless of whether she says she has her own. ....surely?? But even if you do - and you both want to marry and keep it - it's your life. And again, you're 21. An independent adult who can make your own decisions, mistakes and successes now, i.e. explore and experience your world before you hit the age and urge to settle down, etc.. And if your family doesn't like you reaching the age of independence and behaving accordingly, then - er.....perhaps they'd like to try taking you to court for.....er..........er? (LOL) So what are they going to do if you take your right to your own choices? Good parents guide and suggest and explain, not dictate. Have a Dr Seuss quote: "Be who you are and say how you feel. Because those that mind don't matter and those that matter don't mind. See the difference? Your parents/family should only want you to be happy, regardless of whatever it is you do to achieve/organise that. Naughty, naughty parents. "if not I don't really mind and will continue anyway as my parents were always so controlling of my life." Yeah, I kind of gathered, LOL. The clue was in you coming on here to ask - out of habit - other mature adults for their 'permission'. You go ahead, Son. If your parents don't like it - send them here to me and I'll give them What For, including, demanding to know why they're still stuck about 50-plus years in the damn past! :p (...unless they're secretly Immortals? That would explain it? LOL.) "of course I want their approval and won't be so happy if I don't but I will do what's best for me and makes me happiest." You don't need their approval any more. And it's not yours to seek, anyway. It's theirs to give. Or not. Alternatively, as I say, ensure you don't get her pregnant (she needs to live her life to normal schedule as well). That way, you'll prove your parents wrong and in a way that will surprise and delight them. Plan, Stan? ********************* Issue 2: ending your old relationship. "Please help and how on earth can I let F23 down gently as I know she has suicidal thoughts etc that's the main reason I feel stuck because I do care for her as a person she never did anything wrong I just fell for someone else." She has been having suicidal thoughts, PLURAL, even though she's in a relationship with you? Or do you mean, whenever she's sensed you inching towards the "Dear Joan..." speech? Details, please? It's not about doing anything wrong. It's about finding your exact "Cup of Tea".