Would a woman be interested
LILLMA - Aug 23 2023 at 14:50
My husband had his prostrate removed six years ago. Sex as never been as it was but we had it regularly and I make the effort to please him.
My husband as to use a pump device to get it working and I have to wait whilst he does this. I know he doesn’t like to use it and said he is not a real man anymore.
He says he wished he didn’t have the operation and should of got a second opinion. He as wet the bed sometimes and he doesn’t feel good about it. He says I need a real man with spunk.
Would a woman want to know a a man if he told her he had it removed, Would it put them off? I think it would with me.
I asked because I’ve had trust issues with my husband and feel I’m not enough for him. He as looked at porn and been on dating sites in the past and I’ve stood by him though all of this and I’m still here. I don’t know if he is cheating on me at the moment with a woman who knew him before he had his operation. I would love to hire a private detective to get him followed to see if he is carrying on behind my back. He tells me he isn’t and how can he when he’s had this operation. I don’t know what to believe anymore
Chances are that if he has problems having an erection he isn’t going to put himself in a position to ‘disappoint’ another woman. He is feeling ashamed. He is in a bit of shock, his entire life he has done something that he can no longer do. The mind doesn’t know how to manage his current circumstances without creating understanding and vision to believe in.
Im not quick to believe that he is looking for another relationship. I think that he might be seeing if what used to get him up will get him up again, so he looks at porn, and perhaps fantasizes about being with the women on the dating sites. Every thought and feeling we have creates a connection of life within us, and he needs to have some good experiences, even imaginary, in order to feel normal, his regular self, what he is defining to be ‘a man’. Which leads me to possible solutions.
He needs new definitions to believe in.
What IS a man?
What is the true duty of a husband?
What about him makes him the man for you?
Give these questions some time, gather your insights. Your TRUTH will set both of you free. TRUTH has the power to be believed in and he needs to BELIEVE in the definitions of who you are and what life is.
Think about what about him makes you smile, what makes you sigh, what ignites memories. We all dream, we are inspired and our mind goes on trips. Share these experiences. I would write a letter to him so that he can take his time to read it and read it over and over again, truly believing in what you share. I would be creative with it (as creativity is a human drive we all need to do). I would create special cards that reflected individual stories and messages. He can read them all and he can pick one from the stack daily or whenever he chooses to.
You didn’t mention how old you both are but there comes a point in everyones life where we become more spiritually enlightened. Some people are on a relatively easy path or they have made it easy by believing in the right tools that support the mind with connections of truth and love and the ability to process and grow life, creating a natural progressions of life. But most of us are living in ‘ups and downs and turned all around’. We are living with adversity, challenges and all kinds of bad experiences. And we are all developing patterns based on our experiences forgetting that life needs to move forward with understanding, identity and vision.
When I choose my husband I will choose someone that either on his own has realized the fundamental principles and tools of life and FREEDOM, or if he hasn’t already understood the facts of life perhaps we will discover them and learn together, growing a wonderful friendship into a powerful relationship.
The point is that we will be in agreement of the definitions of HOW TO LIVE LIFE. HOW TO BE FREE. HOW TO SUPPORT PEACE. Because it is from peace that good things can grow.
It would take an entire book for me to share my answers to this question. But a few VITAL NEEDS are…
We must understand that negative energy has a hold of everybody possessing people, places, and things. We must cleanse our minds, body, and homes. We must be self aware. The film BIRD BOX with Sandra Bullock is a movie that vitally important.
We must process our thoughts and feelings, EXPRESS ourselves. The film A MAN CALLED OTTO is a wonderful film that will never let me forget this vital human psychological need.
We must be HONEST. There is LIFE in truth and there are disconnections in lies. We are all living in and out of confusion and clarity because energy isn’t pure, the energy we as humans create is polluted not allowing for positive connections to hold life and deliver life. People often ask, ‘why do bad things happen to good people’, my answer is, ‘because God couldn’t get there’. We will stand together on the same side of the table against darkness. We will always seek to understand our own and each others human nature. There are connections to be understood and there are connections that are needed to help us move forward with freedom.
You see, I will have chosen someone that makes this all EASY. My love for him will propel me to protect him like he was my baby. It is natural. It is instinctual to protect someone that you truly love. And in the midst of the most evil times we will find joy and laughter because we are free. Free understanding the truths, the perspectives of truths that we need to be free. Being in love, being in a relationship means that we are developing these perspectives and growing beliefs together.
I have a lot of nick names for my ‘true love’, one is SCRUBBERS. I have noticed that sometimes when I think about him, I take these deep sigh’s. They are powerful. It feels like I am being cleansed inside out. It feels like my connections of thought carry so much love that they flow through me and scrub out all of the negative energy. Naturally.
You might feel that you used to feel that way but over time other thoughts and feelings, experiences have gotten in the way of you being able to feel that way. The mind is a garden, you just need to do some landscaping. Reconnect to what truly matters in life. YOUR NEEDS. And your beautiful dreams.
What are we doing with our time?
By time, I mean tie me, actual connections of life.
There is LIFE in our
INTENTIONS
THOUGHTS
WORDS
ACTIONS
FEELINGS
BELIEFS
EXPERIENCES
There is LIFE in what we do and what is done to us.
What are you doing with your time?
Understanding now (perhaps) how important our connections are…
What do you WANT to do with your time?
What do you want to do with you intentions, thoughts, words, actions, feelings, beliefs, experiences?
Are you EXPLORERS OF LIFE?
I believe that LIFE IS THE DISCOVERY OF TRUTH AND THE CONSTANT PURSUIT OF FREEDOM.
Spend your time growing REAL and IMPORTANT beliefs in your minds.So that the other things that don’t truly matter, won’t matter.
The man that I love… I love him for reasons that are based on the CONNECTIONS OF LIFE that I have created. My intentions, thoughts, words, actions, beliefs, experiences…DREAMS DREAMS DREAMS!! I hold connections of LIFE within me that want to live and will live, if what I believe inside is met outside.
We go through our lives thinking and feeling but not looking at what we think and feel. We MUST look at our experience in order to grow the things that truly matter and let go of what doesn’t matter. Where are we headed without taking some control over our direction?
Have you seen the X files? ‘THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE’ It has multiple meanings but my most recent discovery is that it means that, its out there, its out there to be connected to, so that life can flow through, so that we can be secure and feel alive.
Mulder went his entire life believing that there were extraterrestrials that took his sister, but he couldn’t feel peace because he couldn’t connect what he believed with facts in front of him.
What we believe, wants to live. But we are not taking the time to spell out with words what we are thinking and feeling in order to connect our thoughts and feelings with reflections of our belief.
This is why people talk to one another and journal, it is in order to see whats inside of us acceptepted by another, in order to see whats inside of us on paper in front of us where it is also easier to manage and develop.
Life needs to FLOW.
It has to go somewhere.
The lights in our mind, the connections need to go somewhere.
Our energy needs to be poured into BELIEFS. Secured beliefs.
We need CHOICES. And it is up to US to find them and make them.
Another thing my husband has to be able to do is PLAY BASEBALL. Another story that explains what that means another time perhaps. But you can start by looking for the meaning behind any film that makes reference to baseball and how it relates to creating security within the mind.
I think as women it is our nature to be able to help men see with more perspective. Men are linear thinking. Like rockets. They take their time to choose a direction and then GO. And those beliefs create deep patterns of belief that are hard to get out of the groove of.
I think to as women we need to help guide freedom in ourselves and those that we care about. Look up ‘CHEROKEE WOLF STORY’. It is my favorite story, its simple, its powerful and if the world understood it the world would be a better place.
Life is difficult, love is supposed to be the easiest part of our lives. If it isn’t, we aren’t meant to be. Im not saying it doesn’t take work, but its work that you want to do. I want to be free, we will be Gods children living out our purpose of improving life…supporting the creation of heaven on earth.