I am 36 and never had a relationship

I am 36 years old, male and never had a relationship. I tried various dating apps never get any matches. I also have few friends who live miles away and I rarely see. I also have vitiligo that has affected my confidence. I really want to settle down and get married but feel it is too late for me.

Aye man, you made it to 36. I don't even know if I'm making it 22. Good for you, you made it. I've had a few relationships in my short life, too many talking stages I can't even count. Was it worth it? Fuck no. It's good to get experience in dating though, hopefully you've at least TALKED to girls. Being 36 and never having any romantic relationship going on, maybe you have a mental problem (respectfully). But I'm not here to diagnose you with some "mental illness", you're probably just socially awkward and shy. I also have the same problem. You just need put yourself out of your comfort zone. And I'm sure you've attempted to many times. But social skills are a muscle, if you don't use it you lose it. Notice how everybody became super antisocial and weird after the pandemic. I'm sure you already know how the "self improvement" thing goes. Hit the gym, eat right, buy some nice clothes, meditate, get your mind right. You will find a woman along the way, but remember you need to make the first move. This is completely in your control. Vitiligo is nothing to be insecure about, rock it. Many models get signed for having vitiligo, people think it looks cool. Let go of your insecurities.

We are all in relationships with ourselves and have different experiences that change that relationship. Have you noticed that babies and very young children are ‘in their own world’? They are deeply connected to their own lives, their truth. They are HOME (a term for ‘at PEACE’) and they are always wanting to stay home. Babies and children cry when they need something and stop crying when they feel peace. When adults are not comfortable we can have all kinds of different reactions that lead us further and further away from feeling peace. We often have a kind of ‘trantrum’ not defining our thoughts and feelings, and not able to determine our needs. Good parents teach their children how to articulate and take care of their own needs through the practice of taking care of the childs needs and taking care of their own needs. Children watch and learn. Practice creates automatic pilots giving us room to do more with our lives. PEACE is what a baby wants and needs, everything we do is to support their needs. PEACE is what WE ALL want and need, everything we do should be to support our needs. It is from a place of PEACE that LIFE CAN GROW. At HOME, at PEACE we are secure, connected to our heart and mind, our senses..our lives. We are connected to our fountain of life that gives us life. There are MANY factors disconnecting us from our lives. We are all in and out of control, in and out of feeling good and feeling bad, on emotional spirals up and down. We are all making the right choices and making the wrong choices. We are all connected to our fountain and disconnected. We are all believing in ourselves or thirsty for life. I THINK I FEEL I NEED We must be self aware, we must be able to determine the answers to these questions constantly. Maybe it seems so basic that it feels uncessary in a world where we have so many other questions and answers to generate. So many interests that we explore. So much to do and process. We go to school and then work and have families and everything we do is centered around learning about life and learning about others that we are carried away from home not realizing it because we are still connecting LIFE. Connections of truth with love in our hearts. But. There is a difference between connecting LIFE, and being connected to OUR LIVES. And we need to do both simultaneously. SUNFLOWERS. Losing sight of what is important to us, falling off track has always been a problem but now we are facing danger like never before as negative energy grows taking over peoples lives, creating more disconnections and demons causing disconnections that get in the way of our ability to live. I KNOW you are wondering how this relates to being single at 36. Do you love being with yourself? I mean truly? So much that you would rather be alone than with anyone that doesn’t let you be 100% you? Are you the true you, secure, and able to help those around you be secure? Because without being proactive about your secure connections of life, you will have no life. Your life will be filled with all kinds of problems. Im 44 years old, I have never been in a relationship and I don’t ACTUALLY want one. I have dreams of people that I truly love that I absolutely delight in. And sometimes I feel so hurt from abusive people that I wish a strong man would hold me right then and there (and there is always someone in my heart that does), but for the most part I truly don’t want a partner… Im not looking…I don’t need…Its not an objective. Being ME is. Being SECURE is. Being at HOME is. Honestly it’s a full time job. Its more than a full time job as I know I fail in doing the job right. We should not be looking for relationships. We should be looking to be ourselves And then... If it happens.. it happens. I believe that. However for many reasons I missed the mark on having kids, and that is the only reason why I would think that maybe you would have a time frame to look at. But even then, I would never want a child with someone that I wasn’t going raise that child with. And I would only have a relationship if it was true love. If it just happened. If connections just connected. People should not be going on dates with any expectations. We should be here and now, im me and you’re you…and we are connecting or we are not and those connections can and will grow or not. Same with a KISS. Is he going to kiss me tonight? SHOULD NEVER BE THE QUESTION. EVERYONE IS MISSING OUT OF LIIIIIIFFFFFFEEEE, LIFE ITSELF by not being present, true to this moment, connnected to… truth with love in our heart. A kiss should be something that grows within you… and there is a point that… you must kiss. And all of life should have that (in this moment) energy connection. It is HARD to have and its hard to maintain as our heads get in the way of life. All of our micro connections and choices (not plans) lead us to more or less life. There isn’t anything like it… LIVING. When we have a true relationship with ourselves life is easier. I already have everything I want and need, so to have a husband or not doesn’t matter, there isn’t any pressure or NEED for him, there’s just a good time every time we are together. A good time means a secure time. A positive connection. We grow life because we are coming to the table as two complete people that don’t need anything from one another. We only want and we only want to give, treat each other with truth and love. Being secure, knowing how I am, loving what I do… makes me a wonderful package to open every time he sees me. Also at this point in life we fully realize that all kinds of things can make what we have end just like that. Tommorow we might have to manage something that completely changes our lives…and so this connection here and now… is life…is wonderful.. is ours… is to be ALIVE and LIVE REAL LIFE. Here and now. Connecting life. Here and now. 2 people at home. 2 people at home together. 2 people at peace wanting to ensure that the other is always at peace. My baby. My short answer would be: BE YOU, HAVE A GREAT TIME WHEREVER YOU GO, BE SEEN, OTHERS WILL WANT TO HAVE A GREAT TIME WITH YOU.

Someone really close to my heart is a business man that took the time to produce one song… Don’t doubt your vibe because its you Don’t doubt your vibe because its you Your vibe comes from your HOME, your HEART. We were each individually given life, to be at home and radiate our light, and its never been more needed because people are not defining life in the right ways or creating the right vibrations because they are disconnected. It is your purpose to connect life, to connect truth with love in your heart, to feel peace and radiate peace so that LIFE can live.

Oooops I meant... Don't doubt your vibe because its TRUE Don't doubt your vibe cause its YOU

I have noticed.. HOW MUCH PEOPLE WANT TO FEEL GOOD But don't know what to do. We have forgotten that we are babies. We work to support our needs. We have forgotten that we need to feel good. I fully believe that a warm bath is truly comparable if not better than a hug. So many people are getting into relationships that they don't really want to be in, just because they want warmth. What do you do that feels good? I dance. I dance dance dance!!! I clean!! I write. There is LIFE in the things that make us feel alive. You will meet a woman and learn what makes her feel alive. Then you will do all kinds of things together... that make you both feel alive. I believe that LIFE IS THE DISCOVERY OF TRUTH AND THE CONSTANT PURSUIT OF FREEDOM. There is life in exploration, understanding life...understanding yourself....

There is life in exploration, understanding life...understanding yourself...understanding others. THAT is WHY we fall in love. We make connections We take the time to connect the dots...UNDERSTANDING them. We connect LIFE - TRUTH WITH LOVE IN OUR HEART. ACTUAL LIFE ACTUAL LIGHTS IN OUR BRAIN ACTUAL PATHS that life flows through WE UNDAMN THE WALLS IN THE GARDEN MAZES IN THE MIND. In love we feel good In love we feel free Understanding people is what I do...its what I have always done... its why I am so powerful. I love everyone. Love and be loved Understand and be understood

"I am 36 years old, male and never had a relationship. I tried various dating apps never get any matches. I also have few friends who live miles away and I rarely see. I also have vitiligo that has affected my confidence. I really want to settle down and get married but feel it is too late for me." Excellent! No prior habits to be broken (e.g. ex bf liked X, Y, Z - you don't). Find likewise, and you and she can become completely 'bespoke'. But - dating apps? BLEUGH. We're not blow-up dolls, any of us, that you can choose from a catalogue. And you waste SO MUCH TIME on these things because what's missing - UNTIL you meet and spend your cash - is the very thing that dictates whether you and she will like each other or not: CHeMISTRY. Until those sites can somehow transmit the person's scent, online dating is simply a numbers game. You've got to find any excuse to go out and about, start bumping into people (not literally....although???...nah, joking). Even if it's daily walking to your local shop for a pint of mild....going out of the office to have lunch in a pub garden (read your paper but look around and smile at people). Walk to the park, chuck bread at the ducks (i.e. show off your Male Nurturer/Future Parent side) (IF it's natural, I mean...although, I've always found feeding ducks both satisfying and hilarious because I always feel like I have to ensure every single duck gets its fair share - which is one almight challenge, I tell ya! LOL...makes for a beautiful date as well if you take a picnic. Clubs. They're a cliche because they work. And don't reject women you don't fancy, start a friendship with them. (1) You learn how they tick, what pushes their Happy buttons and keeps them content (AND get given inside intel, (2) they introduce you to their friends and inevitably start wanting to matchmake you (up yer bum, Apps!!) - AND THEY`RE USUALLY VERY TALENTED AT IT! You hadn't even thought of things like that, had you. That's been your trouble. Stop looking at yourself so much, stop wondering what the women think of YOU* and start seeing them as just PEOPLE....but do treat them like a Lady (too rare these days - "swoon-swoon")...open car door, restaurant door, light ciggie, let her order first, LET HER MORE THAN GET A WORD IN! - BLOODY LISTEN!...all of that. As opposed to those who aren't, who are still just practising - women who are READY for a relationship don't give a stuff about your looks, they're not looking for a man; they're looking for a good heart, lovely vibe, good company. If they get to love those, they'll automatically start to notice all the attractive, smaller details of you (e.g. your eyes and lashes) (eyes are the most important attribute, anyway - fact...next come things like, sound of voice, hair, lips, hands, how you walk and talk/mannerisms). Your respective genes will say Hello Sexy to each other without your interference anyway. Hope that helps some? If not - full refund coming your way. Oh, wait - we're free. (Ex-cell-eeeeent!) ;D

PS: Too late? Not even if you were 98 and living in a nursing-home, mate! Love will find YOU, anyway. It's just that Conscious Us are so jumped-up, we think it's up to us and, always impatient these day, that we should interfere. The most primitive part of you runs the show. BUT YOU'VE GOT TO BE GETTING OUT AND ABOUT (club) EVERY DAY OR WEEK. PPS: Go for women your OWN age (or older).

PPS: Forgot one v important tip: You will present as your most attractive to people and women especially, if when they meet you, you're doing something that fascinates you, that you're good at (= appearing confident) and which you consider FUN. Just had an idea... What if you could date women with vitiligo? There must be a society, surely? With meet-ups and other social things?? I'd have thought so, wouldn't you? If not - clearly there's a market so - start one! OR...karate classes. Confidence builder? JUST A BIT! (Lifelong indelible, anyone?) You walk beeping tall after that, I tell ya! Really tones and builds your muscles too...and you'll never be scared of anyone again (piss off, Dahmer and pub thug - KER-THWACK! But you never even GET to the punch/kick BECAUSE just your comportment and voice carry the genuine message that goes: I could kill you with one kick) ...but you don't notice all of that during the classes because you're too busy concentrating, feeling like part of a close-knit team, and having FUN. I can't recommend it enough. That or boxing.

The ultimate key to have the ultimate life and relationship Is to be truly honest with ourselves And find someone that is truly honest with themselves I know that I am not going to waste time NOT LIVING.

"NEVER gonna not....daaance again, Never gonna not....daaance again!" (- anyone name the singer!)