Crush on music teacher

Hi I tried the chatroom but it seemed rather immature. Im a musician trying to learn to play a classical musical instrument. Im male aged 48, my teacher is female 38. Ive been taking lessons from her for about 4 years. We are both in long term relationships. we have a lot in common musically so have grown quite friendly. Ive developed a crush on her which is unwelcome and makes me very anxious and unable to concentrate on my practice. Ive had these sort of feelings for others in the past and found that in time they go but thats when I`m no longer in touch with the object of my affections. I have lessons every two weeks and really dont want to give up the lessons as she is a totally brilliant teacher. What to do?

Hi and sorry for the long delay! Forum regulars are too thin on the ground at the moment. It is a free-for-all public forum of the traditional/old-fashioned variety, though, so, according to how it's supposed to work, please would you post a reply or two (your impressions/opinion/advice or sympathy - or just say Hi and that you're taking an interest in their problem!) to the other thread-creators who are sat waiting with you? (And note this same message is going to all of you.) Once our regulars, including myself, are in a position to, they'll no doubt contribute as well. Thanks! Soulmate

Sorry you have't had a reply, JohnBarret - are you still there? We can still go into it, but, the simple answer is: TAKE A BREAK from the lessons (make up some excuse if you have to) and start to really plant more seeds into your marital soil, so to speak. Even if you're doing it by-rote at first - start dating your 'wife' again. It will take, and take on a life of its own. Proof: happened the first time. Right? Do you lack challenge/mental stimulation and excitement in your life, do you suppose? That can make you do crazy shite like that, that you don't even want to be doing? I know what would 'cure' you instantly, if you have the balls? A bungee jump or a day at a themepark that has genuinely terrifying rides (point is to feel you're in a near-death situation, even though you know you're not)...anything iike that. Easy, compared to ruining your life, because...little secret for you: if you don't meet as fairly long-term singletons and follow the rest of Nature's path - well...put it this way: all the other circumstances in which you meet, connect, bond, lead to dead ends....some with monsters lurking in them. So it's pointless anyway, and, you being programmed to intuitively and instinctually know that, proves you're basically wanting to risk self-harming. Self-Harmer Desperately Seeks Razorblade. Really think it through and you'll realise how that works. So....have a haiitus from the lessons; have a terrifying but thrilling bungee-jump; start just forcing yourself to take wife on romantic - even thrilling! - dates. In fact, together on a the rollercoasters would be about five or more candlelit restaurant dates, in-one.