I just want to run away and hide from everyone

I’ve gone through a lot this past 5 years. My youngest daughter had 3 babies starting at 16. She had issues with the baby daddy so had to foster them with my sister. Now I have one grandbaby living with me. I was ready to be an empty nester. In the last 5 years I have stopped hanging out with all of my friends and family. I stay alone at home all day and never leave my house. It’s really taking a toll on me. My business is not making profit so that makes things worse. I’m so sad I wish I could just disappear!

I am sorry that you have to go through this. It is not selfish to be sad about what you thought your life would be. You daughter obviously needs to take responsibility for her own children, but right now, that is not the case. Your grandchildren are not at fault. But only you can decide if this will bring you down or not. Do not get stuck in what you thought your life would be. Instead, think about what your new purpose is. Life is always throwing balls at everyone, but only you can control what happens after the ball is thrown. You have your grandchild but it is your decision that you do not go out anymore, and it is your decision to figure out what you can do to make more profit in your business. Again, I am sorry for this hope this helps and that everything gets better.

(Nice one, HELLOKAJDHXK!) WannaRunaway, Do you suppose the reason you feel so bad could be down to the fact you haven't got Going Out in you and it's making you feel dysfunctional and emotionally bad and guilty, little realising that this is what healing from everything you've been through - chronic stress and emotional upheaval - is like?...and that it's necessary? Your psycho-emotional In-Tray is too full, basically. You're NOT being lazy and lethargic, etc., you're just incredibly over-busy in your head - ESPECIALLY if you've had to keep a lid on things and stay in control of yourself for far too long (be the strong one). Now, that filing of all those emotional sheets (experiences) insists on being done. So you've been "paralysed". Happens to everyone. It's just what serious psychological healing looks and feels like when you don't know about stuff like this. Your more primitive mind has mutineered you. So that it can take as much of your total bodily energy as it can. If you were still racing around and thinking (using energy) about - in its opinion, UNIMPORTANT, SURFACE stuff - then the healing process would be too slow for prosperance's or even survival's sake. You just need to find ways to cope and manage it (there are loads of things, including fun stuff) so that you DON'T go down the plughole, socially, because of it. And so that you can explain perfectly reasonably and comprehensibly to people, to reassure them that's that all it is (i.e. you're not avoiding them, going off them, all of that nonsense). Your business can wait (says said inner animal). Healing is more important. Like on planes: Own Oxygen Mask First (before attempting to help others). Can you see it now? For a wee while, you have to adapt your lifestyle to suit your Grieving, Healing, Thriving process. It's got you by the short-n-curlies whether you like it or not so the trick is to learn to like it (ish) or balance it with good stuff. Thoughts?

I don't know the extent of the situation and all the details but maybe make her responsible for childcare even if that means she has to get assistance for them. Then while they are in daycare or school you have the day to yourself. I can understand how taking care of children constantly with no help or support can make you start to lose yourself.

How old is this grandbaby who's living with you, WannaRunAway?