I'm getting mixed signals
MARIAAA - May 19 2024 at 22:24
(Typuing fast and js got my nails done so might not have great spelling lmao)
So there's this guy I've liked on and off since November (Now May) but he's giving me MAJOR mixed signals and I'm not a very bold person so I'm so conflicted on what to do.
Here's a rundown on the timeline of my relationships this year. NOTE: He's on my volleyball team cus I play co-ed. Okay so I started liking him in November but it kind of fizzled because I switched teams so when I started talking to some guy from my school in early December I was thinking "Oh it's fine I'm never gonna have to see this other guy again." Then we broke up in early January but in mid December the guy I liked in November switched onto my team so it was rlly awk for me. But yeah so me and the other guy break up and I start liking the other guy again. Then in Feb I stop liking him cus of reasons (I'll get into that later) and then I start talking to someone in early March and then we break up in early April. Now I like the original guy again...
Now he was flirty with me from the beginning so this is the DETAILS.
(THIS IS THE FEB THING THAT MADE ME NOT LIKE HIM ANYMORE) In like feb im with my friend watching a tv show and id never seen it before and she had and she loved it so I was on my phone and she took it cus I wasn't watching the show. Little did i know she had my password and knew that one of my friends had a mutual friend with him. For the sake of this not being confusing the friend with my phone is (H) the the other friend of mine is (P) the mutual friend between P and my guy is (A) and my guy is (E) [not his initial just a replacement] SO!!!! It gets complicated. H has my phone and is texting P knowing that P and E have a mutual friend. P asks A (mutual friend) if E is talking/dating anyone and he says no. So my phone (which is H texting) and P, E, and A allg et put into a gc. E and A had been talking and E was so confused because A was telling E that someone liked him and like it was me (but H was the one on my phone not me I didn't know this was happening) so it was going back and forth they were trynna figure out who i (my phone) was. Then A says that I go to RM and E immediately knows who it is bc he's like "everyone who goes to RM that I know I have their number except her." and as that happens I realize that shes on my phone. I read the entire thing and I'm so mad cus she was saying some... interesting stuff like "Who do you want it to be" when he asked....🤮 ANYWAYS. Everyone stops talking in the gc after that but A messages P and says smth like "he doesn't like her he's talking to someome." P sends me a sc of that and I'm like okay wtv that sucks but idc. Then like a minute later E texts me (I'm the one talking now on my phone) js about the dates for smth he didn't sign up for. Js casual convo and he literally hasen't brought that entire situation up since. It was in FEBRUARY.
Then I liked E again after a bit and he started FLIRTING WITH ME (sorta) So here's the list of thigns he did, some of which were before feb and most after but I can't remember which went where so.... HERE WE GO!!! So. He's done the thing where he pokes me on one shoulder and appears over the other. While I'm sitting crosslegged on the floor he's come right up behind me and talked to me so I'm looking right up at him and he's looking directly down at me. He'll ask me and my partner a question and ignore her and focus on my answer.
So my friend who is on our team invited a lot of her friends to play vball recreationally at the gym we went to and he was there as well with some friends, (Amanda is the bday girl she's on our team and Leah is one of my friends also on my team). So Leah and I walk over to where he's standing cus my stuff was there and he asks us what we're doing there with such a big group and I walk to the other side of him to grab my stuff and she stays on the other side of him and says it's Amanda's birthday. but while she's talking this man pivots away from her to look at me while I'm grabbing my stuff, then I walk away cus I assume he heard her. (We will come back to this but something happened in between these two events.) So also at the party I was sitting at a table with the group of girls eating and he walks up to me and starts asking abt the team insta gc and stuff abt that when he literally came up to me after just being with the CREATOR OF THE GC!!!!!! LIKE DUDE!?!??!?!!?? Okay going back to the thing about my friend telling him it was Amanda's bday, alter that day I was on my phone standing somewhere texting and he coems up to me andstarts talking to me abt smth and then he goes "Wait why areyou guys here?" I'm like, "Did you not hear Leah?" he goes, "Oh I wasn't paying attention." YEAH YOU WERE TOO BUSY LOOKING AT ME!??!??! So I say, "It's Amanda's birthday." "Who's that?" SHES ON OUR TEAM!!!! Leah thinks that he only reason why he knows who she is is because she's always warming up with me and tbh I'm not partnered with Amanda for drills and stuff THAT MUCH so she might be right...." He also finds any excuse to talk to me.
Also the gc (diff gc) found out abt a show I was in and they all wanted to come but I didn't want them to because of the stress that I was in with APs and a show I didn't want the added pressure of people coming to see me but I didn't want to explain my anxiety to the entire gc so i jsut said I have my personal reasons for why I dont want them to come. Two guys (one has a gf and one is a freshman so hell no) were like "Just tell us" NOPE! E went straight from "us" to - "Just tell me" IN THE GC!! So he wasn't at practice that day so that night he snaps me and is like "miaaaaaa what's the info for your theatre performance thing (name of another guy on our team) and I are gonna pull up." I say no but if you can find the link you can come cus I can't stop you. He doesn't reply to that. But then three days later the guy he said he was gonna pull up with messages me asking about my show and is like "I'm just genuinely curious I'm not gonna tell anyone." But I'm like. "I don't believe you because E asked me for the information so you and him could pull up." He responded, "Oh I didn't know anything abt that (something along those lines)" So my brain went, "Oh, E is using him as an excuse to get the info..."
Also on saturday I was in the middle of the show and they went on video call in the gc but I couldn't join. This man spammed my @ in the gc, one of the other guys did it too but only after E started it. E mentioned a different girl saying "B get on the call" But once, he SPAMMED my @ at least 6 times and then other stuff. Then yesterday he had left me on opened for a day and lost our streaks so i messaged him like "Bro left me on opened" and he was like lo srry but you didn't join the video call so you deserve it. I sent a snap of me in a blonde wig cus I was blonde for the show with the text "Should I bleach my hair blonde?" I get a "no" and I reply, "Damn I thought I looked good." "🤣" Then I wish him gl on his AP and he doesn't respond, so i do it again this morning before his AP and he doesn't open it. BUT THIS MAN ALSO! He will view my stories on insta, open my snaps in the gc but not open my private snaps or like my post or anything.... Which means he's making a concious decision not to do it but like why would you if you only thought of me as a friend??
Also we once went rock climbing cus why not and he had climbing rope coiled in like a bubble letter u shape and instead of putting it doen on the bech next to where I was sitting when I was CLEARLY tying my shoes he asks if I can hold it and when I say that I'm busy he tries to PUT IT AROUND MY SHOULDERS!!! It got caught on my ponytail but I was like, that's what people do in moveis when they're abt to kiss someone.......
The other day I went out with him and another guy after prac to get food and he was... Interesting. I was like vibing and singing along quietly to one of the songs in the car and he rested the back of his head on the left shoulder of the car seat beside the head rest, like... Why you doin that buddy? Js sit up straight unless ur like trynna listen to me but wtv. He exsessively talked about girls, like A LOT, for at least 20-30 min and we were only out for like 1 hr or so. He was sitting on the booth with his arms up on the back of it and I was sitting there on my phone and the other guy takes a photo and puts a 🥰 as a caption whens ending it to the gc. And I wouldn't think anything of that if E wasn't looking directly at the camera with a smirk on his face and if he haden't scooted over to me earlier and looked like he was putting his arm around me. Me and the other guy both thought he was abt to do that (it wasn't what he was trynna do but the fact that even his friend thought that's what he was trynna do kind of made me think smth was going on.) So I asked the friend abt the photo with the 🥰 and he said "The photo just cus and the emoji bc of the position." So I asked what he meant by the position and he just kept dodging it and saying "Idk" "I don't remember" Stuff like that. This makes me think that he knows something or he like ships us or something but I cannot tell. Also the breaks in between the messages from him cus I knew he was hone were too long for no reason but I don't know if I'm reading too much into it.
Amanda and Leah both see how we are during practice and they both think he likes me, everyone I tell about it thinks he likes me, I sometimes think he likes me but I cannot tell. Also he's a year older than me and doesn't go to the same school as me so there's that.
I want to tell him that I like him and see what happens esp cus the season ends in less than a month but my issue is that I'll look so stupid if he doeesn't like me cus like he alr rejected me in February and that would be just me saying "Oh I still like a guy who rejected me." Like how pathertc is that? Cus it's been months. But I'm lowk thinking of telling him the last day cus there's the chacne I never have to see him again. But I also lowk wanna tell his friend cus I feel like he could give me info but I'm scared he would tell E but even if he didn't tell (Which i don't THINK he would but still) he would give me so much shit for it during practices. I'm so conflicted on what to doooo.
Hi, sorry for the lack of respondents at the mo. Please continue being patient and I or anyone else here will respond just as soon as humanly possible (- perhaps even those waiting in the queue, themselves - cough-cough-hint-hint! :D)
Oh, crap! MARIAAA, I am SO sorry you've had no response, still!
I'll put you top of the queue and reply myself, first chance I get!
Please can you just confirm you're still 'there'?
Dude idk if you've made a move yet or anything but mixed signals SUCK!!! I was in the same situation with a guy a month or two ago with every single person I talked to assuming he liked me. He was very touchy/flirty but then we found out he pretty much had a gf from another school LMAO. I say that if you know he's a little charismatic flirter and he talks about other girls/ or you know he talks to a lot of girls then don't waste your time on him. Get u a guy who you spend a lot of time with and likes you immediately, and if not immediately, then through the time y'all spend together. I wish you luck with whatever choice you make!
(Oh, bless you for answering, Frittercat!)