Wife is going behind my back... in a weird way

My wife and I have known each other and been together for 4 happy years, and we've been married for one of those years. We have a very beautiful daughter together. We never really fight and never cross each other. We do have the occasional lovers' spat, but who doesn't? Anyway, here lately she's been distant. She's hesitant to tell me she loves me, and she doesn't want anything to do with our child anymore. One night (and I know this might be wrong, but I did it anyway), I snuck onto her Yahoo Instant Messenger, which she is on religiously. You see, she roleplays A LOT with characters she makes up with her friends. It's what she does. But lately, something's been different. So, as I look on her recent messages, there's a guy she's been... Well... She's roleplaying with him, but it's not in-character. She's doing it as herself. And he is, too. And they are expressing their love for each other while roleplaying out sexual encounters. I wish now that I had not looked, because I don't know what to do about it... If i tell her I know, she would know I looked into her Yahoo. But if I don't say anything, it will keep going on and I will get even more depressed. I don't know what to do...

Dear Chuck, I too recently just discovered my fiance of almost 5 years has been emotionally dating someone else online. He completely neglected me for this woman. Not only that they do sexual things with one another on cam. It is very much so devastating and hurtful. The best thing you can do Chuck is move on from the relationship. Once you loose someone's heart there is nothing you can do. Unfortunately, you can try and change her and work on you all's problem but like i said before she may be in to deep.