In pain and confused

I have been married for 8 yrs and my husband is 7 yrs younger then me. He is now 40. I have found out that my husband like very young girls and as he has told me. He doesn't care how young they are. He has made some of these young girls very afraid and uncomfortable. I have seen some young girls try to get out of his eye sight as he just continues to watch them. He has been lieing to me alot. His lies are always about girls and when I confront him about his lies he constantly tells me that it's my fault that he lies to me. I have also found out that he has been keeping alot of secrets from me. Each and every time he lies or keeps a secret he always tells me that he is SORRY and that he will never lie or keep a secret from me again. But after telling me his sweet sorry, he runs out and does it again. It's to the point that I can't trust him or believe anything he tells me and that is making him really angry. I am going day by day living in fear of what I might find out. Is there another lie or another secret. I use to have selfesteem and now I have none. He is constantly telling me that I have no right to NOT trust him. I don't know what to do anymore. He has been telling me that he can't live without me and that he doesn't want to live.He has told me that he would put a bullet in his head. He is a very cold person. His dad is really sick and just a week ago I was going to update him on his dads. He yelled at me and told me he didn't care if his dad died, just put him in a casket and bary him. I thought that was so COLD. A few years ago he had me so stressed out that I ended up having a seizure. After having test after test I was informed that I can't deal with to much stress. My husband is aware of this and he still continues to stress me out. I have sleep apnea which I never had before. He stresses me out so bad that I can't sleep for 3-4 days straight.He gets me to the point where I am crying for hours and he just goes on his way and leaves me in total tears. Im getting to the point where my love is turning to hate. You see I was in a car accident and I am no longer able to work do to my back injuries. I have no means of income and when we got married we purchased a house together and I don't want to lose what I put into the home. I payed out alot of my own money to renovate and update the house. I dont know what to do or where to turn. Is there anyone in almost the same situation as me? I can't talk to him at all. He is the kind of person where it is always about him and he just doesn't care about my feelings, my health or sanity. There is so much more but I dont think this site is looking for a novel. If anyone feels that they can talk and help me, I would greatly appreciate it....

I think you should seek out some free counseling from a professional in your area...they may know of resources to help you...I hope you leave him and become happy and stress free.