Don't know what to do ... :'(

I don't know what to do. I was staying with my guy, Josh, at his apartment for about a week and we were going to head to his house for a short vacation before I had to leave for home (we were at college). All of this happened a week ago. I got out of control and attempted suicide (all at his apartment) (I'm getting counseling for it, don't worry, that's not why I'm here). He didn't even come to the hospital to see if I was ok and he texted me that he removed all of my stuff from his apartment and dropped it off with my dorm's head RA and to not contact him. This was so drastic, I still fell even more apart. Right now, it's getting easier to mask but it's not getting any better at all. Every night he is in my dreams and we are happy together like we were at his apartment (it was perfect when we were there in real life, I don't know what happened) and it was perfect, and every morning I'd wake up with these wonderful memories to discover that they weren't true and I'd just not want to move, to just try to get them back or try to make it seem like they were real. This is very hard on me and I have never been with someone I have felt so strongly for and loved so much, and he's told me the same thing multiple times. We even talked about running away together. Some people have told me that I probably scared him with my attempt, and I only attempted because I was kind-of drunk; I never would have if I had my senses. I just don't know what to do and not contacting him at all is killing me, especially because we were used to texting every day and Skyping some nights and seeing each other some days as well. We were so close. I'd give anything to get him back. What do I do??? Please help.

If he says it's over, then it's over. I totally know what you mean with the heartbreak over someone you love, but if he isn't there for you in hard times, then he never will be. Time will heal your wounds. I know in the darkest of times it's hard to find light, but you have to help yourself before anyone can help you. What you should do is fall in love with yourself and don't worry about him anymore. Look at what you had and move on. I know this is probably not what you want to hear, I understand, but it is essential to healing. The suicide attempt probably pushed him over the edge. Maybe in a few weeks he will seek you out, but you definitely need time off. A romantic relationship isn't an intense infatuation like in movies and books, but it is a deep, deep friendship that will last forever. This does not sound like a romance. Think of it this way, although you feel so strongly for him, it doesn't sound like it's working right now so you can learn, grow, and fall in love with someone you don't even know yet! It is a surprise to find someone, and to know that person will someday enter your life unexpectedly is so exciting. Anyone speaking of running away is fanatical and not grounded. You need someone who is down to earth and can look at things logically to plan a solid future and foundation for the love to grow firmly on. Let the fond memories be a light in your past, to let you know these experiences exist, but not only with this one person. You should not contact him. Let him contact you if he chooses, but don't obsess over it. Work on yourself and what you love and time will heal. Good luck!

I can totally understand your trauma & pain dear but you see something is uncanny about the whole thing!If your suicidal attempt made him take dis rude & drastic decision then sorry to say but he might havent loved u at all cuz dis was the time u needed him the most! try to talk to his close buddies or family if u know any of them! try to track the reason for this action of his else go and directly face him! u owe an explanation atleast!do luck!

Hyacinth had awesome advice for you. You can't give someone else all your power. Nothing is worth taking your life EVER!!! You have to take your self worth back and yes it does take time but you can get there. You will never make anyone happy unless you are happy for yourself! Take care of yourself.