Please read any and all advice is much needed

i am a 25 y/o single mom of one 2y/o. i work a full time job and have been in a relationship (not the baby-dad) for 1 year. i love this person very much and he truly loves me. he is bi-polar and has PTSD but has them both under control very well (withou meds i might add, very proud of him). however, sometimes things get difficult and recently my son has been a problem. my lover has never wanted children and has voiced his opinion that he doesnt really connect well with kids. he is pretty good with my son and in fact has helped me alot with him. but he throws it in my face quite a bit that he doesnt want to take care of babies and that we cant do anything because the kid is always around. we used to talk about marriage and he never mentioned being against it at first and now he says that he never wants to get married to me or anyone else. but he doesnt want to lose me because he will miss me but he cant have me around to much because he is tired of his house being a mess with the baby stuff. i clean up after my son and am constantly whirling around doing whatever i can but it now seems like its not enough. he is an amazing person and he is so loving and kind, ive never had someone treat me so amazingly. i am trying to figure out what to do. when i ask him he says he is not going to tell me what to do that i am an adult and should figure it out. when i ask if he needs space or wants me to leave he says no, when i ask if he wants to leave me he says no. when i ask what he wants it goes back to what i just said. i am trying so deperatly to figure out what to do and i dont know what do thnk anymore. i love him so much but i am terribly lost.

hi

I cant believe that I am reading your post, its almost as reading about my own relationship. I am 33, dont have kids, but came to forum, because I have a boyfriend with bi-polar. Well...right now I am not 100%sure if it is bipolar, but seems to me from description i a book. My boyfriend is someone who from the time I met him was just soooo amazing to me like nobody else, very affectionate, loving, planning future all the time. He is also very stressed from work and takes medication for anxiety , has history of breakdown and depression in past. From the time I met him he called himself GRUMPY MAN, which I begun to understand only after moving in with him. Suddenly about 2-3 times/month he begins shout at me and be completely out of character, huge mood swings for no reasons. Its very painful and as I never experienced it before, I checked online and it seems to be as bi-polar (my ex best friend has it and she behaved the same way). After that happens he feels horrible, very guilty and cant believe what he did. But it doesnt take it away. When I met him he was planning future nonstop, these days he just says he is not sure when he will know that he loves me. Apparently he fell in love with his ex after 1 year together, I am with him 6 months and it feels just very weird I should wait until he loves me. But he says he cant love me yet, because he is scared and horrible experiences with women in past. Most of the days he is the most amazing, while some days someone else. All I can tell you I decided I am going to concentrate on my goals right now, rather than beg for his love. I suffered enough in my life and I know I deserve the best. I know you love your partner but I personally think if he doesnt like kids, neither your own, then it will not be much better in future. Only harder. I used to spent all the time nonstop trying to please my boyfriend but it never seemed enough. These days? I am the number one in my life. Where are you from? If you would like to email me or call on skype, I am here for you...dont worry and be strong.

Yes i too going with same problem, i am having kid & a boy friend , he too good person, due to his mom threatening he decided not to marry me or any other one..becoz he loves his mom very much .. he is afraid if he marry me surely his mom will end her life.. NOw even i too going on same confusion should i wait for him or to move on. becoz already i am 34 yrs my son 10 yrs he is 41 unmarried guy.

Ask him if they can postpone the marriage till the time your kids grows up enough to stop with the baby mess...and can take reasonable care of himself. Talk this out I need advice can you answer mine? http://www.peoplesproblems.org/showtopic/2001/Need-Advice,-As-This-Girl-Confuses-Me?