Can't satisfy her

I'm feeling really down on myself right now, because I'm not able to satify my wife sexually any more. It really isn't because of me doing anything wrong or her feelings for me having changed, its because of a side affect of the medication she is taking for her anxiety problem (without the meds she tends to see the ER a lot). All though there was a time when she was having an online thing with her Ex, but I think we've passed that point now... or maybe not. She has also become less and less willing to make love to me! Because of this I'm so frustrated right now (I'm sure she is also) that I've actually considered cheating on her just so I can be certain that I am actually able to give a woman an orgasim. The thing is for me the greatest part of love making, aside from being together that way, is the giving of an orgasim. I really want to talk to her about this, but am uncertian how to bring the subject up. I mean what do I say? Would I say it like "Hey honey you know I'm sexually frustrated, because you can't have an orgasim and I'm considering cheating on you if it doesn't change!" I'm sure that would end badly. I can't ask her to get off the meds, because I can't take the stress of running her to the ER, because she thinks she may be having a heart attack; so what do I do?

I wouldn't tell her that you are thinking of cheating on her (really bad idea) much better to say what you mentioned first, i.e. "The thing is for me the greatest part of love making, aside from being together that way, is the giving of an orgasim." Could you bring her to orgasm by using other methods of making love? Oral, or other forms of manual stimulation? Is she getting any help such as relaxation training? Panic attacks often happen because a person's residual level of stress has crept up over time. Learning deep relaxation methods can bring down residual stress levels and make panic attacks far less likely, or even eliminate then completely. There are books and CDs on the market, but ideally some initial guidance and support would be preferable. It does take time to the learn the methods and requires persistence. There is a book called: "Mindfulness", that is very good, if you type:- ISBN 978-0-7499-5308-9 into a search box on Amazon you should be able to find it. It includes an 8-week course, and a CD to help with practicing the exercises. Hope this is helpful. ATB Sky

Well I told my husband recently i am sexually frusterated. He pretty much doen't care. I also have anxiety not as bad as you wife but i do take meds for it and it has had an effect on my orgasims with my husband. Well I have been able to have orgasimsa couple times this pastyear with him. I got frusterated and knew it was the meds so I had to see if it was him or me. I had found that porn and masturbating works. Now I am not saying tell you wife to watch porn but I know or at least I hope she knows how to please her self. If she doesn't then thats where you guys need to start . I would incorperate that into sex some how . Being on medication that affect sex sucks, let me say that again SUCKS.LOL. Idon't get enough sex at home either I am a women , attractive woman saying this.Geeezzee. Why would you cheat on her because she doesn't have and orgasim. I wonder if thats the reason why my husband doesn't have sex with me as much. If so that is BS. IF your getting off it shouldn't matter as long as she is ok with it. If I were you the best time to talk about this would be in the bed. I would say I love you and care for you I want you happy in evryway possible . What can I do. She will look at you like your crazy. Continue and just tell he your really wantingto sexually satisfy her and that is what make you happy and let her know that you wil do your best to help he with her problem.