Need a woman's perspective

Our history is this, we are both late 30's, been together for close to a year. We do a lot of things together, and go almost everywhere together. we are engaged and hope to get married this summer. I Have one daughter, 8, and is with me as much as I can have her. They get along very well. Her kids are grown and do not live close. We live together and she drives a very long way to work, and I am very close to work. Here is the trouble, she thinks that I don't care about her. I very often tell her how I feel, I try to do all kinds of nice things for her, I start her car and make her coffee every morning when she has to go to work, even tho it's hours before I have to leave. I try to plan surprise things and am always keeping an eye out for things that she likes. I know that im not perfect, but I dont think I'm doing to bad. She seems to agree with that, most of the time, but when she sees something that she doesnt like, everything else is out the window and its all about that. The biggest, and ongoing problime is that she has to know where I am all the time. She says its because she cares about me, and worries about me, and I have no problime letting her know what I'm doing, I have nothing to hide. Sometimes, however, I will get to work and get covered up right from the start and its 30 min or an hr before I text her telling her that I'm here. This always upsets her and nothing I say changes that. The other thing is that there are parts of the plant that phones won't work, that could cause a lag in when I can text her or, just as bad, I can't get her messages and therefore don't respond in a timely manner. That leads to worring, and eventually some forms of distrust, like "How do I know thats where you were?". The other time it's a problime, is when I'm trying to do something for her as a surprise. I try to keep it on the down low, but then she doesnt know what im doing or where I am and it starts all over again. I know it seems screwed up to some of you, but she is everything to me, and I would never do something to hurt her. She makes me very happy and the only time that she doesnt is when she gets "hurt" by this. It then turns into "I can't live like this", "You hurt me all the time", "It's never going to change"....... And it all comes from her not knowing where I am every min of every day. I would like to know your perspective on that. I dont think I should lie to her, but I wouldn't have these problimes if I would just tell her that I'm in the office all day, or a meeting. Take yesterday, I told her about something that I had to go into town for, she took it as I was leaving right then and a few hours later, she asked if I was still at the place for that many hours. I said no, I just left there and I had been at work until right before that. She didnt like that fact that I didnt tell her right when I was leaving. keep in mind, this is all while she is at work. Tell me please, is she way over reacting to things? or am I thinking only of myself? Thanks.

I think you should never lie to her, it will only hurt her if she finds out you lied. The same goes for keeping things from her or leaving things unsaid. What comes to mind is that she's afraid to be cheated on and that's why she's always asking where you are. Maybe she feels you don't care because she's seen you looking at other women or something of that sort. I'm not sure. If I were you I would just try and update her about where you are as often as you can. This might build her trust in you. But to answer your question I advise never to keep things from her, no matter how small.

i want to ask you, did you tell her how much you love her? I guess, she's not yet secured about your feelings for her. You have to talk one on one and say these problems to her and tell her how you feel. Make sure you tell her how much she means to you and say the three magic words. Assure her that no matter what happens you will not do anything that will hurt her.

Hey, You are not living a free life at all. It looks like you are living a prison life reporting to a jailer all the tine. Whether you agree or not thts how im seeing it. You are an adult and dont have to go through this shit everyday. Again you are trying to cover it up with love and care and all that bullshit. Just for a month move away from her and enjoy your freedom and see what difference it makes. If it doesnot go back to jail life. Your peace of mind is in your decisions you make. You dont have to be reporting to her at all. Just do it.