Gender issues

I'm a 26 year old male with quite significant gender confusion. My family do not consider me to be anything other than a heterosexual male and because I have studied and lived both abroad and in different parts of the country, they are not aware that all my previous relationships have been with men. Unfortunately, even being with men, I still feel completely alien in my body and wish more than anything that I could change gender. Were this everything then I would not have much of a problem. However, I am held in very high esteem by my family, have started a good career and do not wish to endanger that relationship. As a result I have hit something of a mental roadblock. I am deeply miserable in my current situation, but at the same time do not see gender reassignment surgery as a viable option, in light of how it would affect my family. I have tried since I was 14 to put my gender issues to one side through hard work or distraction but nothing seems to work. I also have no intention to commit suicide, because that would again punish my family for my own mental problems. At this stage, I am too afraid to tell anyone of my precise feelings for fear of them treating me like a freak. I would greatly consider any advice on what steps you think I should take next, as I don't want to continue a life full of self loathing. Many thanks. (I'm not sure this is under the right topic, but I thought it was the closest fit).

If you are going to miserable the rest of your life why not take the risk of confessing to your parents and family? I can only imagine the stress that this has caused for you. Although your family will most likely not approve it would make you happier right? All that matters is that you are happy. Idk if this will help you any but there was no responses and I hope it did! :-)