Am I stuck? .. or are my eyes wide shut?!!

So, I've been dating my boyfriend for 2 years now. We've lived together for one. For the first six months of our relationship, everything was great. He had a great job and I was setting my career path as a recent graduate. I felt then after a long time that he was the one. Then i started to see increasing patterns of his drinking to the point where he blatantly cheated on me with another girl and they both laughed in my face. The next day he was filled with regret and came crying for fogiveness. I forgave him under thr agreement he would attend AA classes. He did for awhile until he point we moved in together. I thoughht he was fine but would increasingly see him spending up to $1000 at a time on his drinking pass times. He would buy for his so called friends who seemed to only appear when he had just been paid. This caused constant rows fights between us. It got worse. He decided to run off with a girl and 2 of his friends for a getaway, ended up cheating on me again and losing his job whichh my father helped him get. I was at my wits end and left for some months but forgave him again. He still doesnt have a job but still spends every single penny on alcohol. He is sonetimes drunk for over a week in a row and become physically abusiive when i stop hiim from drinking. He craashed his car drunk so i refuse him to drive mine which ends up in huge fights. I have infoormed his famiky sevverally about the problem and they acknowledgge it but increasingly make me feel guilty for wanting to leave him cause they are usnsure of what he would. Just recently he threateneed suicide if i leave so his parents pleaded with me to stay as they figure sonething out. I feel thatt i am losing myself in thhis relationship and i want to leave and have a ccompanion rather than be soomeone's caretaker but i know i would die of guuilt if i leave and sonething happens especially after his parents begged me. Please help... i feel like i'm stuck bettween a rock and a hard place

Hi I really feel for you because I used to be in a virtually identical position to you. I kept forgiving blah blah it eventually culminated in him hitting me and his mother phoning me to beg me to stay with him or he will kill himself !! Its time for you to be really strong - stronger than you think you are and end things for good. Youll be devastated but youll get over it. Expect it to take some time and dont be hard on your self - it took me a year to get my independence and friends back and to feel good again but it was definitely worth it. You can get away from him but he cant get away from himself, when you can look at him with pity because of that youll know youre on the road to recovery. Good luck:)