I'm so confused

Conversation started today 5:13am Zandria DeLaney you don't know me. Nor do I know you. To be completely honest I'm not even sure how I ended up on this page. But I did snoop on your pictures and comments and saw that alot of people are thanking you for advice, and I have one situation thats really heavy on my mind, and I figured what the hell. the worst that could happen is you look passed my email thinking that its from one of your millions of fan girls. Trust me I know what having groupies feel like and Im not one of them lol. But hell... lets give this a shot... Im 22. Single mother and I work full time as a tattooist. Meaning I work anywhere between 10 to 16 hours a day 5 to 6 days a week. I have no social time and I barely have any mommy time for my son besides the little bit that I can manage to pull after all the arguments that I have to go thru just to get them. I'm dealing with bull shit from every direction... everything from losing a home because I caught my fiance cheating to every financial issue i can possibly think of right now. But thats not what I need advice on. I know what I did wrong with those situations and I know what I have to do in order to fix them. What I need advice with is a guy. Or actually I guess... how to deal with having to walk away. I went the last 5 years, since the beginning of my career, dealing with fake 'friends' and constant manipulation and everything that comes with it. but this man... wanted nothing from me beside being with me and to let him pay my tab at a restaurant without an argument lol. He was an amazing person all the way around. He helped me out alot mentally with out realizing it. everything seemed so much easier to deal with. especially knowing that i had someone at my side that had no hidden agenda or anything of the sort. But this is where the problem lies... because ive been thru so many manipulative relation ships with pieces of shit I got scared. I was feeling too much too quicky. (We had only been talking a couple of days shy of a month. ) So i found some bullshit ass excuse to break up with him, and literally as soon as the final word was said i felt my stomach drop and it felt like I just walked away from one of the few things good in my life for no apparent reason. I work with his sister. She tells me all the time that he was hurt by it. that he felt like I played him. And Ive been trying to talk to him about it since the day that it happened. He was at my job recently and spent 3 hours not acknowledging that i existed until i walked away and couldnt keep his eyes off of me. and he ignored everything else. How do you suggest even if not to get back together but to literally at least be friend, that I could go about fixing this. After some of the shit that Ive gone through I am not willing to let a person like him just walk out of my life. Im sorry if this all sounds like me just being a little cry baby love struck little girl but this is a situation that I am not use to. I dont get attached to people because they never stay for long. He was around the shortest and because he acts like he doesnt see me makes me feel completely invisible. and if you have read this thus far thank you for at least doing that hopefully i hear back from you wether its good or bad. dont be afraid to hurt my feelings. I just need an outsiders opinion. someone that cant judge me

just an fyi I copied and pasted a message I sent to someone else and highlighted too much apparently. Im sorry lol but why wait for one response when i could ask someone else as well

Your story is so touching and the feelings you have for him so obvious. Go to him and beg for him to listen to you. If he sends you away, go back until he doesn't. Send him a letter. Get the message to him somehow!! He sounds like a good guy-don't let your past and any problems you have had from it interfere with your chance to be happy and have a healthy relationship. Good luck!